Mum of 21 yr old autistic son seeking help!

Hi everyone. I’ve raised my son alone - formally diagnosed with autism  aged 15 however should have been aged 10 of school had listened. So fought long hard battle for EHCP which was given. He left school with nothing - but thanks to EHCP attended a college who immediately put the right support in and amazingly he’s achieved some GCSEs and a level 2 and level 3 diploma in personal training. He has found a gym he wants to work at and has applied twice. This second time they said they really like him but would potentially just start him one shift per week (he has openly disclosed his anxiety, fear of public transport, difficulty in interpreting social cues. 
he’s not worked since he left college and it’s affected him mentally - been over eating and staying in bed for long periods.The one shift per week in the ONLY environment he feels comfortable working and engaging with team mates to me is a golden opportunity.

my family are heavily criticising this move as I am a single parent and they feel he should be earning a full time wage immediately to contribute to the household. My sister suggests he takes 2 jobs as one day is not enough. I work full time and felt it more appropriately given the debilitating nature of autism, the visible effects from his anxiety (severe eczema facial flares) that this is a positive and exciting step forwards. The gym did say they would increase shifts once they saw her felt happy. He has now passed his driving test. He is on a good path. I feel my family have absolutely no clue what’s it’s taken (from both of us) to get him to this stage and I am currently off work with stress (first time ever in 21 years).

I would so love to hear others opinions who may have experienced similar? Many thanks and lots of love x

Parents
  • Unless you’ve lived it you will have no clue. Some family unfortunately haven’t had the full autism experience either through choice or just not bothering to educate themselves enough to understand it better. The toll it takes on parents is beyond words, you and your son have done amazing and you need to hear that. Having kids myself on the spectrum it’s no easy ride and there’s a roller coaster of emotions all round but you’ve done an incredible job by the sounds of it. 

Reply
  • Unless you’ve lived it you will have no clue. Some family unfortunately haven’t had the full autism experience either through choice or just not bothering to educate themselves enough to understand it better. The toll it takes on parents is beyond words, you and your son have done amazing and you need to hear that. Having kids myself on the spectrum it’s no easy ride and there’s a roller coaster of emotions all round but you’ve done an incredible job by the sounds of it. 

Children