• Replies 19 replies
  • Subscribers 76 subscribers
  • Views 2013 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Telling teenage children about your late ASD diagnosis

Colabottle

Hello, I'm a newly diagnosed 55 year old woman with ASD and ADD. I'm still processing the diagnosis, which came as welcome shock after a lifetime of feeling different and all the psychological distress and exhaustion of years of masking. I'm cautious but feeling optimistic and curious about how this last piece of the puzzle will finally enable me to understand and accept myself.

I have hidden myself for so long that I want those closest to me to know about my diagnosis. This will be a very small group for now, but most importantly includes my two teenage children. But I'm worried about how this might impact them. Will they be shaken by thinking I'm not who they thought I was, or feel ashamed of me, or worried? Am I being selfish by wanting to share this with them?

I am struggling to find any advice on this so hoping that this community might be able to share some helpful advice and experiences. Thank you Slight smile

Parents Reply
  • in reply to Colabottle

    You might be able to find some support groups for late-diagnosed women via the NAS's directory (search by postcode):

    NAS - Autism Services Directory

    There are also some Facebook groups that you could consider joining, such as:

    Facebook - UK Autistic Women’s Support Group

    • "This is a group for women who have been diagnosed or are waiting to be diagnosed, also includes self-diagnosed with autism/Aspergers. This group is for UK women. We are accepting of non binary and genderfluid autistics. We are trans inclusive."
    • If they wish, group members can write their posts and comments anonymously, with only the group's admins being able to see their identity. 
    • The group has around 10,000 members and is active on a daily basis.

    Facebook - Autistic Women UK - Late Diagnosed (40+)

    • "A safe supportive space for autistic females (cis, trans, female presenting non-binary), living in the UK ,who discovered that they were autistic later in life (40 years and over)."
    • Around 2,000 members.

    Facebook - Autism/ADHD late diagnosed women in UK (mid life plus)

    • "Many women in particular have gone under the radar because their autism and ADHD has been missed. Group founders in their 60s and we particularly welcome women aged 50+. Come and share your experiences, special interests, advice, offer support etc in a safe place. Younger ND psychology or sociology undergraduates needing volunteers for projects also welcome! ..."
    • Around 2,700 members.

    You could also contact your local NAS branch to see whether they're aware of and/or run any groups that meet locally to you:

    NAS - Branches

Children