Hi

I have a Kindle Unlimited subscription because I read so much, it makes it cheaper than buying all the books I read. I don't have one particular favourite book. The ones I have particularly enjoyed over the last year were the Middle Falls time travel series by Shawn Inmon, The Undead series by RR Haywood, most of the thrillers by Frieda McFadden, and The Berlin Sisters and The Pianist's wife by Soraya M Lane (those last two are set in WW2)

I'm currently reading The Golden Cage by Kate L Mary - it's set on a fictional isolated island where girls are trained, ranked and judged according to their looks, not who they are. The most beautiful become tier 1 women, famous and admired but lonely as they are forbidden from seeing family or mixing with those from other tiers. The tier 2 women are trained to be dutiful wives who are "bought" from their fathers by a rich husband. Tier 3 women are allowed to marry but their fathers get no payment for them, and they are workers - the more intelligent can become teachers but many work as domestic staff. It follows the lives of 4 girls the same age who join the institute together at the age of 6. I've just got to the part where they are coming up to graduation and for various reasons they are all destined to follow different paths as adults. It's very interesting.

My favourite occult in Sims 4 are vampires - I haven't bought the werewolf pack as it didn't really appeal to me.

Hi Anonymous234.

I’m not entirely sure what it will involve. My GP said it will be a therapist who specialises in or has dealt with autistic patients before, I don’t know whether this will involve CBT – I’ve heard that CBT can be helpful for autistic people, though I think children benefit from it more than adults according to my GP.

I just asked my GP for someone who can help me with autism and she said a talking therapy with an autism specialist will be helpful and referred me. She did say it depends on your area and I think I’m just lucky that there is one in my area. I don’t know how long the wait times are, I’m hoping not as long as the actual autism diagnosis. That felt never ending!

It’s definitely worth asking about. It could lead to a lot of help for you.
If you look up people who speacilise in autism you might find some local people who can help. I looked it up and there’s a few in my area, some offer digital appointments or are willing to come to the house. A good backup for me if the GP referral isn’t successful or isn’t what I was hoping for.

I hope you can find something that works for you.

Anonymous234 said:

If there's anything that you are struggling with, I hope you get the support. And try to have to look at YouTube videos

Thanks so much. I hope I can find the right support – finding good support isn’t always easy. I’ve had dealings with mental health before and their support program wasn’t very helpful for me. Funny enough I replied to a thread about autistic Youtubers and have had a look at some of them.

Some sound like they will be eye opening. It’s just so positive knowing there are people out there spreading autism through their videos and offering a resource for others.

Anonymous234 said:

Personally, what you're writing, it seems like you're very intelligent

LOL many would disagree with you!!! 

I don't know about awesome but I hope I'm fun. Life's too short and serious to not be fun! 

Anonymous234 said:

Don't listen to the naysayers and haters. They just love you secretly inside

Amen to that.

Anonymous234 said:

You sound like a really caring and empathetic person

Thank you x.

I am very empathic, it's always been a major problem though because I'm unable to detach myself from feeling other's feelings. So if I see someone who is upset, even if it's a stranger, I feel their emotion ten fold. This is why I want to see someone who understands autism so they can help me work through this because I have no idea.
When I was at school a girl came in all upset and said how her rabbit died and I was more upset than she was by the end of the day...

I think if I was a counsellor I'd end up asking my patients to help me

Anonymous234 said:

Now I better stop typing more, otherwise I'll go baaaa-rmy (get it? Sheep and nature lol)

*clap clap clap*

Love the nature humour.

I think we're all a bit baaaarmy, nothing wrong with that

Hi August. I am replying to your message on this thread. I have never heard of an autism therapist before, is this the same as CBT? Please may I ask what do I ask the GP for 

I tried an NHS Service for therapy/counselling, but they told me they mainly deal with people who have mental health conditions...

So I think it's a case where I'll have to do some research myself instead. Try to find anything that works. Self-advocacy here. 

If there's anything that you are struggling with, I hope you get the support. And try to have to look at YouTube videos, or any webpages that can help with social skills. Day at a time, you don't have to research it all in one go. If you have learnt something that day, then that's good progress, isn't it?

Personally, what you're writing, it seems like you're very intelligent. I think if someone thinks you're weird, they either don't understand you as a person, or they're possibly not in a good mood, or maybe just not a nice personality. Many factors really. You seem awesome and fun.

Don't listen to the naysayers and haters. They just love you secretly inside.

You sound like a really caring and empathetic person, wish you were my counsellor lol. You have many interests and hobbies which I hope, at least, give you some comfort. I think you should start your own safe online community one day. I'd be one of the first to join!

Now I better stop typing more, otherwise I'll go baaaa-rmy (get it? Sheep and nature lol)

I think people should speak their minds, however I understand why not everybody does. If you change your mind I will listen and offer support, if wanted/needed.
Always be true to yourself and sod everyone who thinks you shouldn't 

Thanks for the luck. I need it lol.

I thought about reiterating my own struggles but I decided not to.  It's the same story told countless times across all of existence.  I wish you luck, people like me are quietly shunned for having independent thoughts and daring to dream beyond the autistic bubble.  I'm not afraid to say the world is a stinking garbage dump and the people suck.

Hi again. I don’t see a problem in that, so many people find self validation and comfort with a self diagnosis or they choose to get diagnosed like I did. It really depends on the individual and whatever works for them. I highly suspect my brother is autistic but if he wanted to I know he would be fine with self diagnosing rather than going the professional route.
So long as it brings you that comfort and self knowledge I think that’s all you really need. For me I Had to know. I don’t know why, I just had to and that’s brought me so much peace of mind and self validation.

Good job on sustaining working… this is something I really struggle with. Retirement must be nice, lots of time to play Sims 4

I love reading! Yeah they shouldn’t ageist like that. I think books can be enjoyed by all ages. I have some from my early childhood that I still read, and enjoy now. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that.
Do you have a fave book you like reading?

My fave book is The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern and I love the Skulduggery Pleasant book series.

Oooh your Sims 4 project sounds huge and a lot of fun!!!! Cool!!! I think the creating and building in Sims 4 is my fave part, I spend more time in CAS and build mode than actual gameplay, that said I do have a few Sims generations and legacy games that I’ve been doing ooh 3-6 years depending. I haven’t done my own worlds before though, that sounds fun and clearly is an amazing project to do. You’ll have to let me know how you get on with it, though clearly you have done amazingly already!
I would love to do more building in my actual game saves but I’m terrible at building!!

I love the premade households, the Goths are my fave followed closely by the Pancakes.

Did you see burglars are now part of Sims 4? I’ve enjoyed having them in the game again. I like how the burglar alarm can be upgraded, mine shocks the burglars in my latest save.

What’s your fave occult to play as? I like the werewolves and ghosts. The werewolves get so much hate but I actually really like them lol.

I used to play a lot of Fallout 4. I need to get back to that at some point, it’s been a while!

Absolutely right. Always happy to listen and talk if you need

I saw in my email inbox you wrote a message earlier. It's gone now, but, if you want to re-write it please do. I don't know if I'll be here every day but if you write me I will respond. I can't help fix anything but I can be a friend and listen. Take care x.

Hi ArchaeC,

Thanks so much.

Pretty new diagnosis for you too then? I'm glad you got that validation, and that you found this site. I have a feeling this is going to be invaluable for me being here. I hope you find this site of help. If you ever need anything, I'm always here

Hi Echo! Welcome here

Hello August, welcome to the community.

I like your name. I am in my 60s and was diagnosed just last December.  I have finally found my place within this community. I hope you enjoy engaging with some of us.

Hi and welcome!

I joined 9 days ago. I'm still finding my way around.  

Hi again August

I'm not officially diagnosed. I did the AQ50 test (result: 42) and another one my doctor asked me to do and when he reviewed the results he agreed they indicated autism, but said there was not much point getting a diagnosis as I wouldn't get any support because I'm self sufficient and was working at the time. Having read the stories from other diagnosed adults on here it seems most of them were just told they were autistic and left to get on with it. I know it benefits some people to have a professional diagnosis, but I have trust issues and because I masked so well I didn't trust anyone to diagnose me. I know who I am and I feel I belong here, where I was welcomed from the first day I posted.

I like lots of different types of books, including sci-fi, fantasy, time travel, historical fiction, thrillers, satire and post apocalyptic stories. I have enjoyed quite a lot of books that are classed as young adult fiction, although I think it's a bit ageist to class books as such! 

I'm currently playing Sims 4, which is one of my favourite games. I say playing, but I'm actually working on a big project creating my own worlds - making lots of houses, community lots, households, etc. I kept a few of the original households - I like the Goth, Landgraab, Pancakes, Zest, Jang & Lynx households and the vampire ones Vatore & Straud so I kept those. I have the dine out pack so I've made a restaurant for most worlds, including a Chinese restaurant in San Myshuno called The Golden Moon, a Japanese one in Mt Korembi called Cherry Blossom Diner, an Indian one in Newcrest called the Taj Mahal (built to look like the Taj Mahal!), a gothic style one in Forgotten Hollow called Twighlight Bite, and a burger bar in the shopping area of Magnolia Promenade (shaped like a burger) I've also built some museums, and I'm particularly proud of my natural history museum which is shaped like an elephant. I have used lots of different architectural styles in my houses, including Art Deco style, a boat house, Greek villa, 1960s style bungalow, a lighthouse home, and one that looks like a space shuttle (some aliens live in that one)

My other favourite games are Fallout 4, assassins creed odyssey, BioShock & Hogwarts Legacy.

My experience is similar to Lotus  and yours. My birthday is the last day of August which meant I was always the youngest in my year at school. I've been enjoying GTA5 since 2013 offline mostly (I just got to experience it online for a few weeks on my PS3 before it was shutdown for PS3s online in December 2021). Lately I'm also enjoying watching this YouTuber playing through it for the first time ever as I'm very familiar with the story and so on    www.youtube.com/.../tyT9bhfyqqA 

Welcome The Fool. I think you have a lot of things to share. Sharing is caring. :) August  I think it would be worth hearing this person's struggles and hopefully find a way to support them somehow.

....

August said:

And I think you and I are of similar minds and thinking as well

Maybe.  Just a tiny bit 

They laugh at me when I choose to use the self-checkouts.  Thing is, I don't actually agree with them as it's less real jobs for real people...

But sometimes, I feel I really don't want to talk to anyone...   So there I am packing a whole trolley into quite a small space next to this till that weighs each item (and films me) and the supervisor walks up and says 'You know, you've far too much shopping for a self-checkout till, you need to use a regular till'

But I do love retro gaming, and Tetris was a big thing.  And I view it as a challenge to fit all these irregular shaped objects not only in the small space they provide next to the till, but in the shopping bags afterwards (without anything getting crushed). 

By the time I've completed this procedure there's normally three of them standing there watching me, and wondering how nothing has fallen on the floor.  

I don't know about OCD.  I do have some routines, but I'd call them important and necessary, and they serve a purpose (things go wrong if I don't do things the way I do them) so by my reckoning these are Autistic quirks rather than anything else.

I do like reading things that make me smile, and things that are familiar to me do indeed make me smile.  

I’m hoping I will interact with lots here who have the same or similar interests as I do. I’ve already met somebody here who likes the same sort of games I do and Lego too. Off to a great start!

And I think you and I are of similar minds and thinking as well

overwhelmed & underwhelmed ( O & U ) said:

According to the figures as many as 2m in the UK could in theory be Autistic - with or without diagnosis - so perhaps there are more about than you know.  Perhaps some of those we know are Autistic and don't realise!

This crosses my mind regularly. Sometimes I’ll see somebody in the shop specifically organising stuff in their bags so frozen and veg in one bag and it’s all in this neat perfect order and I think, I wonder if they are just very organised or it’s like autism OCD where it has to be in order.

I’m like this with my own shopping and I saw a man before who organised his shopping in that exact same way and I thought then I wonder if he’s autistic, or like I was then waiting for a diagnosis.

It wouldn’t surprise me if my older brother is autistic. He has a lot of the traits.

I’m glad I found this site and decided to actually participate. It’s nice knowing there’s a whole community out here that ‘Gets It’. It’s a huge door opened when at the start of the year I was still unsure of my autism and felt completely alone.

You never know what you end up talking about on this site, or with who.  

Most people on this site are kind and welcoming, and if you stick around you'll likely find out you've got interests in common with many of them.  Of course, there are some that aggravate - just like any other part of life - but the trick is to not let those spoil the whole thing. 

It is nice to speak to people who are listening and not purely stressing or ranting - not that those coming here with stresses aren't important too. 

According to the figures as many as 2m in the UK could in theory be Autistic - with or without diagnosis - so perhaps there are more about than you know.  Perhaps some of those we know are Autistic and don't realise!

I suppose Autism - and all things related to it, is a bit of a special interest of mine, and you'll know what Autistic people are like when they get talking about things that interest them!

Not that I haven't got other things I'm interested in too, just that Autism becomes a way of life - a way of being - which most don't consider effects every aspect of what we do, say, think and feel.  

August said:

Just talking to you here has been a breath of fresh air.

That's a nice thing to say, a nice thing to hear & I feel that way also when someone joins who is on the same wavelength and has similar experiences to share.  

overwhelmed & underwhelmed ( O & U ) said:

Have you ever had those conversations when someone asks, you start talking & then you hear them doing other things in the background?  As if they've put the phone down while they get on with something else?  

Yes, all the time. People are so rude, they ask, making out they are interested and then when you answer what they wanted to hear they are no longer interested. I’ve spoke to my gran on the phone and she asked what I’ve been up to so I start telling her literally everything with all the detail, as she asked, and then I hear things in the background.

In the past I’ve heard her

• Turn the TV on
• Ironing (I heard the hiss of the iron)
• Chatting in the background to my Grampy (So she obviously put the phone down somewhere and went off)
• Dusting

It’s so rude and the fact that people ask you things first is even worse because they are just feigning an interest. Asking like it’s their duty to ask. I think that’s horrible and I hope I will never end up like that with people.

I don’t much like talking on the phone but when I’ve asked how my relatives are I always am interested and when I ask what they have been doing I am genuinely interested and enjoy hearing what they have done lately. I never do anything else but listen, so I don’t miss anything and don’t hurt their feelings by not paying attention.

A lot of effort goes in to talking to people either in person or on the phone. People don't realise how much it takes it out of you...

overwhelmed & underwhelmed ( O & U ) said:

I actually believe that Autistic people do conversations better than they do. 

I have no experience with other autistic people, except here on this site. I’m hoping to get a bit more outgoing and hopefully will encounter some autistic people. In my town there’s an autistic society and they host groups apparently so this is something I will look at doing at some point.

Just talking to you here has been a breath of fresh air. Talking to Nts is hard work and they don’t get me so I think I’ll just wait for when I meet others more like me.

I think by now people realise that they WILL get my life story or at least a long version of my day if they ask - so perhaps they don't ask quite as much.  Or they've got clever and say things like:

How has your day been?  or  What do you have planned for the weekend?

They know I'm going to over-explain.  

Have you ever had those conversations when someone asks, you start talking & then you hear them doing other things in the background?  As if they've put the phone down while they get on with something else?  

I mean I know some people SAY they can do 10 things at once but no way are they really listening to what I tell them when they are eating with the TV on or having a full conversation with someone else in the room with the dog barking at the same time.  I'm not stupid. 

But they ask, because they think they are being polite and that they are doing me a favour (!!)  They don't seem to realise that it's actually really frustrating to know you aren't being listened to properly when you're making an effort to talk...  or write or whatever.  It's rude. 

I actually believe that Autistic people do conversations better than they do.  Because they want to say what comes out of their mouths and want to hear the reactions to sustain the talking.  Their conversations aren't the same (they are built on things that aren't true).   The only problem is there are so few Autistic people compared to the rest, so we don't get the chances they do.