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Secretive Behaviour

Galaxy42

Hi folks.

Hope you're all well.

I have recently received an Autism diagnosis, at the age of 50.

That means, of course, that I have spent 50 years believing that my behaviour and worries are the same as everyone else's and that I was just pretty crappy at dealing with these struggles. I had my "Oh my God" moment when I discovered actually the reason I was so physically and emotionally drained is because I was dealing with daily mental struggles that 'most' people don't have to face. Many of these now make sense to me.

I am though incredibly secretive. I keep worries to myself, I don't share feelings (I have them, plenty of them) & I also despise being watched but I still don't understand why.

I don't hide things, if my wife would like to view my phone she can have it, but if she looks over my shoulder to see what I am doing on my phone, I feel my privacy has been invaded. If anybody wants to help me cook they can peel the potatoes but if somebody watches me cook I feel as if I'm not trusted. I have loads of similar examples, but won't drone on.

Does that make sense?

Does anyone else feel this way?

Is this an Autistic thing, or am I just odd?

(I mean, I am odd, but that's a separate issueRofl)

Parents

  • I also very much hate being perceived. I think for me it’s about bad past experiences. People often tell me that I’m doing things the wrong way or at least in a very weird one, but most of the time I do things very conscientiously because I just need to do them a certain way to cope.

    Sometimes my “secretive” behaviour leads to interesting conclusions with other people. There have been several misunderstandings where people thought I was doing something forbidden just cause I actively tried not to draw any attention to myself.

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  • I also very much hate being perceived. I think for me it’s about bad past experiences. People often tell me that I’m doing things the wrong way or at least in a very weird one, but most of the time I do things very conscientiously because I just need to do them a certain way to cope.

    Sometimes my “secretive” behaviour leads to interesting conclusions with other people. There have been several misunderstandings where people thought I was doing something forbidden just cause I actively tried not to draw any attention to myself.

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