Newly diagnosed ADHD and ASD

Hi Carl

I’m going to say congratulations on your diagnoses because that’s the response I prefer. I think if nothing else, it has been extremely validating for me. I did a lot of deep diving research and reading before I got my dual diagnoses Nov and Dec last year and I’ve also kind of exhausted the will to continue in the depth that I did previously, because I think I was trying to constantly validate my self diagnosis as well as learn more about something I was totally ignorant about a few years ago.

Did your provider supply any support sessions following your diagnosis? I went through Problem Shared via right to choose and I’ve just started my ADHD support sessions this week - although still waiting for dates for the ASD sessions. It’s good to have support in a group with others who are in a similar place.

I have found a few ways to help myself get through life a bit better - I work part time in an office job (lucky enough to have my own office and take my dog to work (which is a blessing and a curse)) I found that if I ‘listen’ to a podcast whilst I’m working, it controls my monkey mind and allows me to focus on what I’m doing instead of being distracted by other trains of thought. I don’t actually hear much of the podcast because it’s allowing me that focus, but it’s a good trick for my brain! 
If you start to understand your needs due to how your neurodivergence affects your daily life, you can make changes or ask others to change how they work with you to better communicate etc in a way that works for you. 
I’ve embraced my love of soft toys and have a few, along with some fidget toys and books that I loved from my childhood. Things that can help regulate me when I’m feeling overwhelmed. 

One of my biggest problems is overwhelm so my husband is now recognising when I’m getting overwhelmed and takes the pressure off by helping me with stuff. I also realise that if I’ve had a taxing day at work, I need to take the back roads home instead of using the motorway as I get really stressed driving on motorways - so I don’t add to my overwhelm by increasing my stress before getting home.

There are lots of things I guess we grieve for - like the fact we might have a different work life etc if we had been diagnosed earlier and learned the skills/got the support to do things that we thought we couldn’t because we thought we were broken or stupid.

I’m coming to terms with a lot of things and I swing between wanting to shout it from the rooftops that I’m AuDHD and wanting to keep it to myself. I’ve come across a few people who have been less than supportive and told me that it’s a load of crap and that I’m totally normal and don’t need labels…. The same people that have told me I’m weird in the past….

I’m late to the party being diagnosed at 49yrs old and I really wish I’d known a long time ago. It would have saved me feeling broken and screwed in the head for so long. I hope you can find some ways to make things better for yourself and accept the traits that you do have and manage them in a world built for people who's brains have a different operating system. Don’t give up trying to learn more if you can - there are so many podcasts that you can listen to while you are driving. Search for adult or late diagnosed autistic or ADHD and you will find plenty of resources. ADHD chatter is a good podcast on that side of things. I’m not sure about the ASD ones as I’ve specifically listened to late diagnosed female podcasts.

Hi Carl

I’m going to say congratulations on your diagnoses because that’s the response I prefer. I think if nothing else, it has been extremely validating for me. I did a lot of deep diving research and reading before I got my dual diagnoses Nov and Dec last year and I’ve also kind of exhausted the will to continue in the depth that I did previously, because I think I was trying to constantly validate my self diagnosis as well as learn more about something I was totally ignorant about a few years ago.

Did your provider supply any support sessions following your diagnosis? I went through Problem Shared via right to choose and I’ve just started my ADHD support sessions this week - although still waiting for dates for the ASD sessions. It’s good to have support in a group with others who are in a similar place.

I have found a few ways to help myself get through life a bit better - I work part time in an office job (lucky enough to have my own office and take my dog to work (which is a blessing and a curse)) I found that if I ‘listen’ to a podcast whilst I’m working, it controls my monkey mind and allows me to focus on what I’m doing instead of being distracted by other trains of thought. I don’t actually hear much of the podcast because it’s allowing me that focus, but it’s a good trick for my brain! 
If you start to understand your needs due to how your neurodivergence affects your daily life, you can make changes or ask others to change how they work with you to better communicate etc in a way that works for you. 
I’ve embraced my love of soft toys and have a few, along with some fidget toys and books that I loved from my childhood. Things that can help regulate me when I’m feeling overwhelmed. 

One of my biggest problems is overwhelm so my husband is now recognising when I’m getting overwhelmed and takes the pressure off by helping me with stuff. I also realise that if I’ve had a taxing day at work, I need to take the back roads home instead of using the motorway as I get really stressed driving on motorways - so I don’t add to my overwhelm by increasing my stress before getting home.

There are lots of things I guess we grieve for - like the fact we might have a different work life etc if we had been diagnosed earlier and learned the skills/got the support to do things that we thought we couldn’t because we thought we were broken or stupid.

I’m coming to terms with a lot of things and I swing between wanting to shout it from the rooftops that I’m AuDHD and wanting to keep it to myself. I’ve come across a few people who have been less than supportive and told me that it’s a load of crap and that I’m totally normal and don’t need labels…. The same people that have told me I’m weird in the past….

I’m late to the party being diagnosed at 49yrs old and I really wish I’d known a long time ago. It would have saved me feeling broken and screwed in the head for so long. I hope you can find some ways to make things better for yourself and accept the traits that you do have and manage them in a world built for people who's brains have a different operating system. Don’t give up trying to learn more if you can - there are so many podcasts that you can listen to while you are driving. Search for adult or late diagnosed autistic or ADHD and you will find plenty of resources. ADHD chatter is a good podcast on that side of things. I’m not sure about the ASD ones as I’ve specifically listened to late diagnosed female podcasts.