Middle aged ASD diagnosis.......and stuffed?

Hello,

So after more than half a lifetime of feeling different and never really understanding other people, I have received an ASD diagnosis 3 months shy of my 48th birthday . I have suffered from 'depression and anxiety' throughout adulthood, and have been working my way through the NHS library of SSRIs and SNRIs as each successive medication appeared to lose its efficacy. Fortunately, or unfortunately depending on how you see things, I have been able to mask, compensate and 'sort of manage' too effectively over the years for anyone to ask serious questions until the Covid Lockdowns finally pushed me over the edge.

I kind of understand now how I've ended up where I am, but that doesn't really detract from the frustration of it: getting on for fifty, no 'real' friends, no partner, no plan for the future. And it feels like no time left to do anything about it. As is my way (ha-ha, but not funny) I am desperately trying to work out a plan (my therapist is doing what she can to help), but it feels like I am stuffed.

I'm assuming that someone on here can relate to this?