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Middle aged ASD diagnosis.......and stuffed?

JamesB

Hello,

So after more than half a lifetime of feeling different and never really understanding other people, I have received an ASD diagnosis 3 months shy of my 48th birthday Dizzy face. I have suffered from 'depression and anxiety' throughout adulthood, and have been working my way through the NHS library of SSRIs and SNRIs as each successive medication appeared to lose its efficacy. Fortunately, or unfortunately depending on how you see things, I have been able to mask, compensate and 'sort of manage' too effectively over the years for anyone to ask serious questions until the Covid Lockdowns finally pushed me over the edge.

I kind of understand now how I've ended up where I am, but that doesn't really detract from the frustration of it: getting on for fifty, no 'real' friends, no partner, no plan for the future. And it feels like no time left to do anything about it. As is my way (ha-ha, but not funny) I am desperately trying to work out a plan (my therapist is doing what she can to help), but it feels like I am stuffed.

I'm assuming that someone on here can relate to this?

Parents

  • Hello and welcome to this wonderful community. Slight smile

    It's understandable to feel frustrated when you're not where you want to be in life, especially when it comes to relationships and your future. It's important to remember that you're not alone and that many people feel the same way at some point in their lives. It's great that you're working with a therapist to develop a plan, and that's definitely a step in the right direction. It's important to be patient with yourself and to take things one day at a time. It may also be helpful to focus on the things that you can control, such as your own actions and thoughts. Try to avoid dwelling on the things that you can't control, such as the past or the future. Instead, focus on the present moment and what you can do to make the most of it.

    I'm nearly 30 and I'm not where I hoped I would be in my life by this time. I don't work, I have no friends, I'm still living at home and I don't really feel like I'm living, more existing. I try not to think like that though and linger on what I haven't achieved. Otherwise it's too depressing and heaps on the pressure to try and do more.

    I focus on the good things, the things I have achieved like having worked in the past and also getting my driving license. Both were extremely difficult and I'm proud I was able to do them.

    I hope you're OK and things improve for you.

Reply

  • Hello and welcome to this wonderful community. Slight smile

    It's understandable to feel frustrated when you're not where you want to be in life, especially when it comes to relationships and your future. It's important to remember that you're not alone and that many people feel the same way at some point in their lives. It's great that you're working with a therapist to develop a plan, and that's definitely a step in the right direction. It's important to be patient with yourself and to take things one day at a time. It may also be helpful to focus on the things that you can control, such as your own actions and thoughts. Try to avoid dwelling on the things that you can't control, such as the past or the future. Instead, focus on the present moment and what you can do to make the most of it.

    I'm nearly 30 and I'm not where I hoped I would be in my life by this time. I don't work, I have no friends, I'm still living at home and I don't really feel like I'm living, more existing. I try not to think like that though and linger on what I haven't achieved. Otherwise it's too depressing and heaps on the pressure to try and do more.

    I focus on the good things, the things I have achieved like having worked in the past and also getting my driving license. Both were extremely difficult and I'm proud I was able to do them.

    I hope you're OK and things improve for you.

Children
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