Published on 12, July, 2020
- m15, gcses this year, grades are questionable in some, decent in others + I barely revise (severe lack in diligence)
- no problems with sounds or anything. i'll only have a meltdown if you get my mother to berate me for half an hour because that is genuinely overwhelming
- communication feels fine, although my mouth feels slow sometimes and i probably sound dumb (how do i fix this)
- had an autism diagnosis when i was younger + earlier life was a mess and i've pretty much forgotten it. feel "less autistic" as i age but that's probably an illusion
- for some reason just wouldn't write large pieces and consequently can not write anything (more than a couple of sentences; i overthink) for my gcse english (lang && lit).
- socially, i have some basis of how to act but still end up feeling like something was done wrong.
- any clarification required?
- i've also probably forgotten something important
- i don't think i have adhd (don't fit dsm criteria), or maybe just it isn't that conspicuous.
- essentially, i don't know how to feel.
- please don't tell me to cope with this, unless i'm just being naive.at this point, i crave change towards """""normality""""" and acceptance.
I don't know what would neurotypically be considered "normal." I mean there's information and studies done on autism, but I find it hard to find anything on just what neurotypical development would be like, what "normal" would be like. It is just the typical development of a human being, but what the heck does that specifically mean? It just isn't very obvious to me what kind of developmental milestones neurotypicals experience, because I can't find it listed anywhere.
I think that a majority of people don't like how their own voice sounds, but over time, I've realized to just concentrate on the message I'm trying to convey to others, more than just becoming fixated on how slow or stupid my voice sounds. I just stopped caring. If I sound slow or stupid, so be it, but at least I have a voice, so I'm going to use it to get information across to people.
As long as you can live a relatively normal life, and can socialize with people to a degree, I think that's fine. I mean, I don't know what kind of things you want to do with your life, but I think you should aim to do the things you enjoy, regardless of your past diagnosis.