Does Taking Medication Mean I’m Taking the Easy Way Out as an Autistic?

I read this and thought i would share it for your thoughts.....

The obvious answer to my question is no.

However, I didn’t always feel that way. In my 20s, I saturated myself in healthism and orthorexia. I thought I could control and optimize my body and mind simply by addressing my diet, getting enough exercise, and going to therapy.

I incorrectly thought that if someone needed psychiatric medication, it meant they weren’t doing the internal and external work. I assumed they were just treating the symptoms instead of the root cause.

This was further reinforced by a brief stint of anti-depressants I took in college. After a fire that consumed all of my physical items, I entered a deep state of depression. My doctor suggested Prozac, which I took. It didn’t help. It even worsened some of my symptoms.

Worsening symptoms is something doctors watch out for when they prescribe psychiatric medication. I incorrectly thought that if one psychiatric medication negatively impacted me, then all the rest were garbage as well. I didn’t know that certain medications can impact you differently depending on how your body responds to it.

I later took SSRI’s again after my mom died. I entered another deep state of depression. The medication I took that time helped (Zoloft), but I felt like a zombie. It was sooooo weird to barely think anything at all. In some ways it was very calming, and in other ways it was alarming. I didn’t want to Zzombie my way through life, so after three months I weened myself off

I also started therapy at that time, thinking that would be enough. It wasn’t.

Look, I’m a therapist, I clearly believe in the power of therapy. However, it cannot resolve everything.

Some things are just outside of our control.

I didn’t believe that until I learned I am autistic. I realized how different my brain is than a neurotypical brain, and that it’s ok to not measure myself by neurotypical standards. I will always think more and feel more than the average person.

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  • I felt like a zombie. It was sooooo weird to barely think anything at all. In some ways it was very calming, and in other ways it was alarming.

    I understand this feeling of being calming and alarming at the same time. When I had first tried anxiety medication, I felt so weird then it made me start panicking because I thought the medicine was changing the way my brain worked, but due to the medicine, I couldnt feel myself panic which led to me panicking even more (and even WANTING to feel panic). Anyway I stopped taking it because it freaked me out too much.

  • Hi I find the following interesting.....

    'I didn’t believe that until I learned I am autistic. I realized how different my brain is than a neurotypical brain, and that it’s ok to not measure myself by neurotypical standards. I will always think more and feel more than the average person."

    As i understand it we dont need fixing, so to live free of psychiatric medication, to be our authentic selves, which would include for many, the anxietues etc or to take medication to allow us a betUpside downr quality of life? I think i have just answered my own question Upside down 

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  • Hi I find the following interesting.....

    'I didn’t believe that until I learned I am autistic. I realized how different my brain is than a neurotypical brain, and that it’s ok to not measure myself by neurotypical standards. I will always think more and feel more than the average person."

    As i understand it we dont need fixing, so to live free of psychiatric medication, to be our authentic selves, which would include for many, the anxietues etc or to take medication to allow us a betUpside downr quality of life? I think i have just answered my own question Upside down 

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