Does Taking Medication Mean I’m Taking the Easy Way Out as an Autistic?

I read this and thought i would share it for your thoughts.....

The obvious answer to my question is no.

However, I didn’t always feel that way. In my 20s, I saturated myself in healthism and orthorexia. I thought I could control and optimize my body and mind simply by addressing my diet, getting enough exercise, and going to therapy.

I incorrectly thought that if someone needed psychiatric medication, it meant they weren’t doing the internal and external work. I assumed they were just treating the symptoms instead of the root cause.

This was further reinforced by a brief stint of anti-depressants I took in college. After a fire that consumed all of my physical items, I entered a deep state of depression. My doctor suggested Prozac, which I took. It didn’t help. It even worsened some of my symptoms.

Worsening symptoms is something doctors watch out for when they prescribe psychiatric medication. I incorrectly thought that if one psychiatric medication negatively impacted me, then all the rest were garbage as well. I didn’t know that certain medications can impact you differently depending on how your body responds to it.

I later took SSRI’s again after my mom died. I entered another deep state of depression. The medication I took that time helped (Zoloft), but I felt like a zombie. It was sooooo weird to barely think anything at all. In some ways it was very calming, and in other ways it was alarming. I didn’t want to Zzombie my way through life, so after three months I weened myself off

I also started therapy at that time, thinking that would be enough. It wasn’t.

Look, I’m a therapist, I clearly believe in the power of therapy. However, it cannot resolve everything.

Some things are just outside of our control.

I didn’t believe that until I learned I am autistic. I realized how different my brain is than a neurotypical brain, and that it’s ok to not measure myself by neurotypical standards. I will always think more and feel more than the average person.