I feel like a Freak and cannot not find someone who would want a relationship with me!

Having  to counsel young people having difficulties, one thing I've realised is that it doesn't help to say you have years ahead of you to sort things out.

A classic line I found colleagues doing was to say to a distressed student, why don't you let these things rest until after you've finished your degree.

Whoa....when you've only lived 18 or 19 years, two or three years ahead is a long time. It is easy for older people to have hindsight. But for most young people the immediacy of a conflict makes things they might get used to by the time they are forty into real life and death issues.

It must be particularly bad to have a socially undermining disability on top. I say this because I cannot compare my own situation - I had staggered development, for want of a better word - I don't think puberty happened until late twenties, so relationships weren't such an issue for me, other things were.

From a counselling point of view, I've found these things have to be addressed somehow quickly, especially from an academic point of view, if it is undermining a student's degree progress. Conventional romantic issues you can get students to see advisers, or actually talk over the perspectives, or go find them books or websites.

But with Aspergers and Tourettes combined, I really wish there was better advice around. There always seems to be a problem where disability arises, especially where behavioural issues are involved, people still seem to think you shouldn't be forming relationships. But if anything you should, just because it might help.

Can you develop friendships through on-line chat rooms? Do these help you explore the issues?  The barriers are actually meeting someone and either not mentioning the problems until they surface awkwardly, or explaining up front, and watching them step back and go all quiet on you. But within a social chat room environment you can at least explore some of the issues before actually meeting someone, not necessarily someone you've chatted to on line. Just that you've sorted out some concerns and reduced the stress maybe.

Also social chat rooms include people with disabilities, and some are quite up front about these. After all you are often using a "nom de plume"/user name, so as you aren't telling people who you are, you can experiment with saying that you have aspergers and tourrettes, and seeing how people react on line.

Finally, even if you are not a student, some university campuses have events that are suitable for disabled students, that you could attend as an outsider, worth looking into this. You might find if you are near a university or college where events are available where you could meet people with less tension about disability.

Keep this thread going and let people know how you get on. There must be others in similar situations. By airing the difficulties on here, that's a way of sorting out your ideas and it helps everyone else as well.

Having  to counsel young people having difficulties, one thing I've realised is that it doesn't help to say you have years ahead of you to sort things out.

A classic line I found colleagues doing was to say to a distressed student, why don't you let these things rest until after you've finished your degree.

Whoa....when you've only lived 18 or 19 years, two or three years ahead is a long time. It is easy for older people to have hindsight. But for most young people the immediacy of a conflict makes things they might get used to by the time they are forty into real life and death issues.

It must be particularly bad to have a socially undermining disability on top. I say this because I cannot compare my own situation - I had staggered development, for want of a better word - I don't think puberty happened until late twenties, so relationships weren't such an issue for me, other things were.

From a counselling point of view, I've found these things have to be addressed somehow quickly, especially from an academic point of view, if it is undermining a student's degree progress. Conventional romantic issues you can get students to see advisers, or actually talk over the perspectives, or go find them books or websites.

But with Aspergers and Tourettes combined, I really wish there was better advice around. There always seems to be a problem where disability arises, especially where behavioural issues are involved, people still seem to think you shouldn't be forming relationships. But if anything you should, just because it might help.

Can you develop friendships through on-line chat rooms? Do these help you explore the issues?  The barriers are actually meeting someone and either not mentioning the problems until they surface awkwardly, or explaining up front, and watching them step back and go all quiet on you. But within a social chat room environment you can at least explore some of the issues before actually meeting someone, not necessarily someone you've chatted to on line. Just that you've sorted out some concerns and reduced the stress maybe.

Also social chat rooms include people with disabilities, and some are quite up front about these. After all you are often using a "nom de plume"/user name, so as you aren't telling people who you are, you can experiment with saying that you have aspergers and tourrettes, and seeing how people react on line.

Finally, even if you are not a student, some university campuses have events that are suitable for disabled students, that you could attend as an outsider, worth looking into this. You might find if you are near a university or college where events are available where you could meet people with less tension about disability.

Keep this thread going and let people know how you get on. There must be others in similar situations. By airing the difficulties on here, that's a way of sorting out your ideas and it helps everyone else as well.