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Just introducing myself.

louisa29

Hello everyone. 

I am a mum to a 4 yr old who was diagnosed with ASD last yr. She has delayed speech and does not communicate or interacts with her peers. She has been at school for 2 and a half wks now and seems to be settling. I am so anxious for her. 

I would love it if anyone can advise me on if I should be pushing for a statutory statement. Teacher is arranging for IEP as she has gone in under school action plus. My paediatritian says she Is shocked that there is no statement and has written to LEA but no sure if any notice will be taken.

  • Something that can be confused with shyness in ASC, is being unwilling to approach other children because of not knowing how to do so.  Also, there can be a general unwillingness to participate in socialising as it's not particularly pleasant and it can be very difficult to keep up.  Find out what her interests are and how she would like to pursue them.  She is likely to have a passion for something.  If she finds particular things boring that her peers like, there's not much you can do about that.  The AS mind loves learning, but on our own terms.

  • Try not to think of her as shy. If anything she is more likely, by necessity to be bolder. The problem lies with social interaction, making eye contact, understanding the nuances and inflexions of conversation. She wont be able to learn as fast or as effectively. Therefore it will prove uncomfortable, and she is more likely to appear reticent or aloof.

    But its not shyness. I think there is a danger of trying to encourage her to be less shy, when that isn't the problem. 

    The "boring" reaction is universal with kids. It is less likely she is bored than she is having trouble interacting and doesn't want the discomfort. Also she may want to do her own thing in her comfort zone, and being moved out of that do do what you or others want is uncomfortable.

    Do "after school activities" involve interacting with other kids? This is a communication disability. Communication and interaction is hard and uncomfortable. Being forced to socialise is missing the point.

  • I am a mum to a soon to be 13yr old (in 3 days) she was diagnosed with ASD only in march this year so its still very raw.

    My daughter has always been shy and finds it difficult to interact with her peers.

    She is not really interested in doing anything everything is always "boring".

    She won't do any after school activities. we are still struggling abit too be honest.

    Especially with hygiene issues and telling the truth.

  • Thank you for your reply crystal12. I have arranged appointment with SENCO at school so see how it goed from there. Teacher also agrees a statement would be beneficial.  

  • Hi - yes, do everything you can to get a statement.  It will benefit her educationally.  Check out the home page + the posts for info about statementing.  On this site we all find out sooner or later that we have to fight to get what's needed.  Good luck with everything.  Ask anything you want.  People will try to help.