Published on 12, July, 2020
I feel like part of my has just "shutdown", "checked-out" or "shut up shop"? It's like I'm doing the bare minimum to get by - working, cleaning myself and closed but not much else. I have lots of hobbies and crafts that I like, but I'm maintaining them but buying stuff for them, but doing very little with them. Thing is, I can't work out how I'm feeling. if I'm sad or depressed. I feel more confused as to why every thing has stopped. If I just leave it, will I start up again, or has everything changed for good. I think I'm just waiting for something to be different, even though it might never change. I think that worries me, as I used to enjoy working out and I'm not doing that, needle craft and doll art still has my interest to watch other people doing it, but not myself anymore. Drawing and painting used to help, but that's died.
I've been focusing on not being too hard on myself and just seeing what happens which is why I've not been to upset and stressed by it. But how will I know if this is just my life now, or if I'll be what I was before?
As a side issue, I finally looked at my medical history online. I didn't realised I'd been diagnosed with anxiety in my teens, or fully diagnosed as an anorexic. My mother didn't tell my and the doctor didn't do anything about it either, but it was there in black && white. Is this unusual? I'm 52 so maybe that happened a lot back in the day.
You are probably in a burn out phase.
I can’t do anything when I burn out, and that included talking, showering, cooking, eating.
Interests do come and go. I would suggest choosing one of those interests, and doing it for a very short amount of time. Aim to repeat this a couple of times a week, and increase when you are able. Might be best ti start with working out. Just 10 minutes. It might be very hard to motivate yourself, and you probably won’t feel any better for it, but it will be helping you.