into

• I want to say all the right things, but right now - i am really struggling
• Took all the tests - yes I have ASD
• My sisters and brother (older) want nothing to do with this diagnosis - the family that I thought I had - that I showed up for -  crickets

I feel untethered, ungrounded

At first I was like - woah, yeah - of course - wow!  my life finally makes sense

Now - i just want to reel it all in and take it back

This is a lesson that I learned throughout my life - how to diffuse a situations that I inadvertently created -  

• adding for clarity that I now understand how much I have been accommodating/understanding people and their behaviors, while not being afforded the same.

I don't want this to go away - it really makes my life make sense

But the consequences

Having a rough go of it today

Cate

Including a photo of me as a kid -

she gives me strength