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Hello, my name is ...

Trillianne
over 11 years ago

Hello all, I just wanted to say I'm here, feeling alone and confused (and if possible, guilty too)

I am a 35yr old married mum of 1 wonderful miricle little boy and am struggling to come to terms that one of my worst fears is coming to light, I suspect I have been ignoring the signs for some time but now have to face the possiblity that we have another issue and that is ASD, Aspergers or ADHD. I say another issue since my son also was born with a heart problem and currently benign CF (there is a chance it could develope into active as he gets older).

There isn't a day goes by that I'm not greatful to be his mum but I already feel guilty for passing him the burden of CF and regardless I will feel guilty for whatever the outcome of his diagnosis now.

I just feel so alone. Is there anyone else out there like us? 

Parents
  • over 11 years ago

    Thanks Crystal. Deep down I know everything you say is true, we don't even know the extense, how he would be affected or any limitations he may have, I just feel like my life is falling apart around me and there is nothing I can do to stop it, the news of my little boy comes at an incredably stressfull time following a family death a few months back and me being made redundant, I was already an emotional wreck to begin with. I feel like I was doing the right thing, I went back to work so I could provide for my husband and child so sacrificed so much of his baby time to keep a roof and food and clothes, I kept saying to myself that I would get to do that with grandchildren, like my mum is doing now with him (she had to go back to work early when I was tiny thus I was raised by my grandparents) and now I can't help feeling I've been robbed as some sort of punishment, like even though I thought I was doing the right thing it was actually selfish pride, I should have done the thing I'm proud of not doing and asked for help, been selfish and stayed home and now it's all gone.

Reply
  • over 11 years ago

    Thanks Crystal. Deep down I know everything you say is true, we don't even know the extense, how he would be affected or any limitations he may have, I just feel like my life is falling apart around me and there is nothing I can do to stop it, the news of my little boy comes at an incredably stressfull time following a family death a few months back and me being made redundant, I was already an emotional wreck to begin with. I feel like I was doing the right thing, I went back to work so I could provide for my husband and child so sacrificed so much of his baby time to keep a roof and food and clothes, I kept saying to myself that I would get to do that with grandchildren, like my mum is doing now with him (she had to go back to work early when I was tiny thus I was raised by my grandparents) and now I can't help feeling I've been robbed as some sort of punishment, like even though I thought I was doing the right thing it was actually selfish pride, I should have done the thing I'm proud of not doing and asked for help, been selfish and stayed home and now it's all gone.

Children
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