Published on 12, July, 2020
I'm new, thought I'd just say hello to you all.
I'm still awaiting an official autism diagnosis, I'm on the NHS waiting list for an assessment, but there's a 3 year waiting list, I'm on it.
I've only recently looked for an diagnosis, now I'm 54. Yet I didn't really consider myself to be autistic until fairly recently, as everyone's normal is different. I don't think an official diagnosis would be life changing for me, but it would be nice to put that final piece of jigsaw in place.
It's only been over these last few days that I've actually spoken openly about it. It's just something I've carried with me all of my life, hidden it within the best way that i can, as no doubt a lot of us try to do.
After browsing a few posts on here, It's certainly helped and I can see a collation between myself & others on here.
Hi and welcome, I’m 54 and gone through life mostly alone and puzzled by all of it. It was only last year that autism came onto my radar. To be honest it was a big shock and a massive relief, my life finally makes sense. I approached my gp and was referred. I received a screening pack about 6 months later. I don’t have a parent to fill in the questionnaire about my childhood. I’ve lived with my wife longer than I lived at home so she added a letter explaining what she has noticed. To be honest it was a bit of a hard read, a lot of what to me is normal apparently isn’t. The wait in my area is about two years. At first I wanted a diagnosis instantly, now I’ve grown into my skin a bit more and use some of my time researching autism. I know that I’m autistic, the formal diagnosis will just bring me the validation i need. Unfortunately there isn’t much help afterwards. I was quite angry with myself for not realising I’m autistic for over 50 years but know that being different in schools of the 70’s and 80’s would have been even worse. School is unfortunately where we learn to mask and I’m only just learning that it’s okay not to mask and actually be quirky me, only at home at the moment. The hard part is working out which parts of you are the real you and not the false persona that we created to fit in and look normal in the strange world. Good luck with your journey.
Thanks for the welcome & input, I'm 54, too.
I've enjoyed reading your reply, much of which makes a lot sense to me.
I think I've always been myself within my little family bubble & at work, as I'm a lone worker, well saying lone, I do work with adults with learning difficulties, but mainly without other staff, present. It's other staff I can have difficulties working with, have done so within the past, especially when working within close groups.
How I am is my norm, so I know no different, only until recently that I've really considered autism. Yet I've worked with autistic adults for over 15 years.