Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi,
I'm 30 female British Indian waiting for autism assessment on NHS, long waits. Also waiting for counselling and talking therapy. Thinking of going private because the wait n the NHS is annoying me. I am highly sensitive and believe I have asperger's (high level functioning autism). I struggle to enjoy life, no friends, not close to family as most of them ignore me and don't accept the real me. I hate the cultural pressures to conform and the stigma around autism and mental health in my family. I hate the pressures of having to mask all the time just to please everyone else and blend in. I am thinking of quitting me job but not sure what to do with my life. I need answers and a diagnosis asap before things get worse. My dad might also have autism but he's in denial and they all reacted negatively when I tried telling them I think I have autism. I might have to cut ties with them soo and run away. I'm scared and anxious about my future life. I'm not sure I can have a happy life.
Sharon
If you can afford it, go private. I couldn’t afford it lol, but I did it anyway, for my daughter and then myself. It was necessary. And I feel so much better. No, I’m not cured, I’m still anxious, I still avoid things, I struggle with other things, but I am me. I’m more aware of myself, and I put myself first. Life is gentler. And yes, I’m quite proud being Autistic.
Try not to be too quick with decisions affecting work. Give yourself time to get the diagnosis and think about things. You will then be able to make adjustments or such like as needed….
Family might come around when they know more about ASD. Maybe you can leave something out for them to stumble across? It’s not easy to hear that you may be Autistic, so your father is probably doing all he can to ignore it. It’s easier than coming to terms with it. Leave him to his own devices and focus on you. You’ll come out the other side and feel better for it.