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I'm 30 female waiting for autism assessment

NAS81690
over 2 years ago

Hi,

I'm 30 female British Indian waiting for autism assessment on NHS, long waits. Also waiting for counselling and talking therapy. Thinking of going private because the wait n the NHS is annoying me. I am highly sensitive and believe I have asperger's (high level functioning autism). I struggle to enjoy life, no friends, not close to family as most of them ignore me and don't accept the real me. I hate the cultural pressures to conform and the stigma around autism and mental health in my family. I hate the pressures of having to mask all the time just to please everyone else and blend in. I am thinking of quitting me job but not sure what to do with my life. I need answers and a diagnosis asap before things get worse. My dad might also have autism but he's in denial and they all reacted negatively when I tried telling them I think I have autism. I might have to cut ties with them soo and run away. I'm scared and anxious about my future life. I'm not sure I can have a happy life.

Sharon

Parents
  • over 2 years ago

    Hi, and welcome.  Yes its a long wait unfortunately, though hold out for the NHS one as its preferable to a private one.  A diagnosis won't change your family/cultural circumstances, sadly this a world-wide things for many autistic people from different cultures and backgrounds, you may want to read about it online and Twitter has many autist people talking about these things, as the cultural consequences of having autism can be worse than just everyday abelism that most face .  You have analysed your situation so you know its going to be difficult, though try and gain strength by accepting these things aren't in your control, only you are,  and for now try and read about these things and connect with autistic people, especially those who know your own culture issues, pressures, and consequences, and try and gain strength.   Cutting ties and running might feel the right answer, but if that really was what you wanted then its the sort of thing to plan the best thing to do rather than just do out of panic.  

    https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/what-is-autism/autism-and-bame-people

    See if there are any helplines anywhere that might help even if not necessarily because of autism but other/similar reasons.

    Explore all options - that's pretty much the autistic way when finding support.

Reply
  • over 2 years ago

    Hi, and welcome.  Yes its a long wait unfortunately, though hold out for the NHS one as its preferable to a private one.  A diagnosis won't change your family/cultural circumstances, sadly this a world-wide things for many autistic people from different cultures and backgrounds, you may want to read about it online and Twitter has many autist people talking about these things, as the cultural consequences of having autism can be worse than just everyday abelism that most face .  You have analysed your situation so you know its going to be difficult, though try and gain strength by accepting these things aren't in your control, only you are,  and for now try and read about these things and connect with autistic people, especially those who know your own culture issues, pressures, and consequences, and try and gain strength.   Cutting ties and running might feel the right answer, but if that really was what you wanted then its the sort of thing to plan the best thing to do rather than just do out of panic.  

    https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/what-is-autism/autism-and-bame-people

    See if there are any helplines anywhere that might help even if not necessarily because of autism but other/similar reasons.

    Explore all options - that's pretty much the autistic way when finding support.

Children
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