Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello i was recently diagnosed with autism and I'm in year 10 of school and my year head said I'm not allowed to wear my ear defenders in lessons because "I'm year 10 and i should be listening" she also said "others in the school with them dont wear them in class so" and also said she would take them of me if i wear them in lesson again. at the end of the day she said ill only be using them to ignore the teacher she was smiling but i cant tell if she was joking or not. Also today my geography teacher told me to take them of she had not even started the lesson yet and was sorting test papers out, and the classroom was loud at the time. i took them of and the noise caused me to cry instantly and it just kept getting worse and i ended up hitting my head and people ended up laughing at me and pointing out i was crying. then the assistant teacher that helps me and my friend came in i was still in this state. and i ended up hitting myself loads of times again she offered to take me outside but i didn't say anything. today i told my counsellor what happened and she said she will get a plan in place and a few other things. also she handed test papers out and said i got 0 and the class was quiet and people was laughing at me again. and she wrote on the test not even tried. on the day of the test i didnt understand a single question and ended up crying. i feel like no one understands me so i remember coming on this website before for information on autism before so i decided to write something. does anyone have any advice. sorry if this makes no sense
Hi,
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Clare Mod
What you are experiencing is discrimination and you need to tell a responsible adult. The way the school is behaving may actually be illegal. Talk to your parents or guardians about this. You can also try ringing NAS's education rights phone line on 0808 800 4102.
Also I'm sorry to say when the moderators come in to check on this post they will probably ban you as this forum has a 16+ age limit. Please don't take this personally and do feel free to come back in a few years.
Hi. First of all, welcome to the community! Many of us have had the same or similar issues going through education and I certainly understand where you're coming from.
I'm sorry to hear that your teachers are being ignorant and incredibly unhelpful. It is unfortunately a common issue that plagues that profession but the good news is you are in the right here and the bad news is it may take some fighting for them to understand that.
Do you have a SEN coordinator that works with you? Have you and your parents had a meeting with the school and the SEN team to discuss your needs? If there is a plan in place that allows you to wear ear defenders when things are noisy (and classrooms are really noisy, feel free to find a decibel counter to prove this to your head of year, I think some of them are a bit in denial about just how noisy classrooms are, especially if you're sensitive to sound) and this plan with the SEN team does not say that you won't wear them in class, then you can wear them in class. If the plan says you can't wear them in class then the plan needs to change because you getting sufficiently overwhelmed in class that you are crying and hitting yourself means that the plan isn't working. If you don't have a plan at all (you have an assistant but that doesn't necessarily mean you have a formal plan, I certainly had an informal one where everyone just assumed someone had said I could do what I was doing) you need to contact the SEN team to make one. Meltdowns and sensory overload in class are not conductive to learning and therefore it is in your educational interests as well as your wellbeing ones (but if you push educational they may be more inclined to listen) that they put steps in place to try and avoid it.
I don't know what your relationship with your parents is like but I would strongly recommend getting them to contact the school. Especially the SEN team. If you don't get on with your SEN team, go to a member of staff you trust and ask them to help you take navigate this system.
In the mean time while the school and Senior Leadership Team drag their feet as they are known to do, I recommend a few things. Number one, if you are getting that overwhelmed again, take the offer to leave the room. It's less damaging to you and equally damaging to your education and you're less likely to be exposed to the ridicule which I am well aware from experience makes nothing better. Also, it makes them have to choose between you being in the classroom with ear defenders, or out of it due to a meltdown without them. Nice clear choices and consequences can help them move faster sometimes.
Number two, I don't know why so many senior leadership team think that ear defenders allow you to ignore your teachers, it's a line I've heard before, when in my experience the reducing of background noise is the only thing that allows me to comprehend my teacher. Bring this up if you're feeling confident, maybe talk to your assistant teacher about that fact to see if she wants to bring it up with difficult teachers. In terms of helping your education when you're finding the classroom environment difficult due to a lack of accommodations, I don't know how you learn best but there are lots of resources like videos and textbooks which while it may not be as useful is a stopgap if you want to follow that.
Number three, your teacher is awful. I know teachers are sometimes not the most discrete but that is not the appropriate reaction to a student doing poorly in a test especially given the distress you were in at the time. My worst teacher for this stopped after I had a breakdown in the corridor before the lesson leading to me spending the lesson in a art prep room (it was a maths lesson and I didn't take art) and then going up to him at the end of the lesson and explaining, while crying, that it was making my taunting from the class worse and could he please stop. The fact that his sixth formers were in the room having come in for there lesson and started tearing into him about bullying young students probably helped. I didn't intend to have the breakdown but it was certainly effective. The others were harder to deal with but I eventually got them to ignore me.
If you like, I have google docs with links for and comments and quotes on studies and articles on how public shaming in an education setting doesn't work and is really harmful because we had an issue with my younger brothers head of year and I'm tenacious. Sending this stuff as emails or letters works well, sending this stuff as impeccably polite emails or letters with evidence backing you up is apparently 'cheeky' and 'taking the mic' but is easy to fight on them trying to discipline you for it, especially if you tried talking informally first, because although weird non-autistics like to take meaning from words that you said because that's what they've decided the 'tone' says, you haven't technically done anything wrong.
Maybe a more doable option is to find a teacher you trust and complain about the actions of this teacher, they were very unprofessional.
If the school is uncooperative, I know that others on this site know of education help lines and advocate charities that can help put things in place for you. I'll leave them to share them, and if they don't I'll go googling but they do exist and can be very helpful.
I'm sorry if this was long and blunt. Your post made me angry at your school because I completely understand what you're dealing with as either I or my friends have experienced it at some point. You will be able to get through this and your school does have a legal obligation to put a plan in place that supports your needs and your teachers and your head of year have a professional obligation to follow said plan.
I hope some of that was helpful, welcome to the community, feel free to reply if you have more questions or clarifications to make. Good luck, I hope this gets sorted.