Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi there,
A couple of weeks ago, my young son was diagnosed with autism. Even though this wasn't a shock, it's still been hard for me and my wife. I am struggling in my own head to know where to go next. Not in terms of information, that is clear and the help is clearly spelt out on websites like this, just mentally.
I can't help feeling guilty and worrying greatly about his future. I blame myself, which I know is not healthy or necessary, but given I recently took the online autism test (scored 40) it has left me in limbo. I'm a grown adult with a good life, so there's no need for me to be diagnosed, I've just been lucky to be able to mask how I feel about the world and feel inside all of my 36 years, but now I need to try and nurture a very young one, and I'm finding it hard to know how. I have told very few people of his diagnosis, none of my friends, as I tend to keep myself to myself, I'm certainly not embarrassed, he's a wonderful little kid. But I feel like I need to talk to someone or hear from someone. Strangers might be the best way forward.
James
Hello,
When my son was diagnosed at 4 I was terrified. I wasn't sure what it meant for him, for us or our future. It was really a scary and emotional time. Be gentle with yourself and your partner, you will work through it if you support each other.
You possibly being on the spectrum is a real benefit to your boy! You might not think so at times, it does make it challenging, but understanding him and his needs help you to advocate for him better.
My son is now 20. We have a very happy 'normal' life together and have a great relationship. I was diagnosed just over a year ago.
You've come to the right place for advice and support :)
Thank you. My boy is 5 so in a similar situation as you were. It's really helpful to read this kind of thing. We don't know anyone going through similar, so it is a great help