Published on 12, July, 2020
HELLO. I am Mum to a 9yr old boy who was diagnosed last year with both ADHD/ASD. Currently my little boy is withdrawn and socially awkward. He barely speaks to other children and has attached himself to another little boy with the same disorder in his class. Although they are great friends, it doesnt help him mix with classmates. He feels alone at times as his friend likes football and he hates any contact sport or personal contact! I have been told he can walk around alone at breaks which is just heartbreaking.
He has just started art therapy in school though I know very little from it. He doesnt share much information.
I am finding it difficult to get him to engage with us socially at weekends. He refuses to go out and will not even go for short walk.
Does anyone out there have any suggestions or have been through similar difficulty?
Would really appreciate the support right now x
Hi,
As someone who has been that kid, I would like to let you know that every single friend I made throughout school was either autistic or later got diagnosed as autistic. I found everyone else confusing, they found me 'weird', this led to disaster when I attempted to socialise with them when forced to by my primary school teachers (who would discipline me if they thought I wasn't "practicing making friends" enough through loss of quiet time and books) and I was badly bullied for most of KS2 and then again for all of KS3. I know you only want the best for your child, but I think you should talk to your child about what they want, and accept that they may not be motivated by having hundreds of friends but instead prefer a few very select ones. Children are cruel to what they see as other, and personally I preferred being alone (not the same as lonely) to being picked on and feeling utterly exhausted all the time due to the socialisation I was having to do.
Being alone is not necessarily a problem. I recommend talking to him about his goals