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Hello

Sarah
over 2 years ago

Hello I'm Sarah. I was diagnosed with Autism when I was 13 and really life has just been a wild ride since then, it's up and down all the time.

I live with my family and they take care of me and look after me. I'm rubbish with money, I don't work and I get extremely anxious and have meltdowns. I can't go shopping because of this. My family are good as gold though and never complain. I'm so lucky to have them.

But there health isn't great and when there gone I want to be capable of looking after myself so next year I'd like to move out and try to stand on my own two feet. Not sure if I'll cope tough. But I feel I need to try, otherwise my siblings will have to look after me and I really don't want that.

Do you think it's a good idea me moving out and trying to improve myself? Is it hard living on your own?

I really want to get better at coping.

  • over 2 years ago in reply to Dawn

    I used to be nanny for my cousinsLOL

  • over 2 years ago in reply to Mariusz

    Yes indeed, some traits manifest as strengths and others as wopping big problems for all of us. And we can be at extremes in each case. I'm hyper organised on the upside, but find it very difficult to tolerate mess and live with other people's mess on the downside. 

    But I've taught autistic kids who struggle to organise the simplest of things and are in a permanent mess with everything, bless 'em.

    Sarah, it might help to look at your skill set to see what you're good at too. Some of your strengths might be deployed to help compensate for the harder things. We all do some stuff differently from NTs, but still get there.

  • over 2 years ago in reply to Dawn
    Dawn said:
    my autism makes me ultra independent

    I forget it's not always the same for us

    and jumped straight to the most difficult problem for me

    one that outmatches me still

    but like Dawn said, it's a learning curve, just another skill, or few

    cooking, cleaning, shopping, paying bills, taking out rubbish, going to work, planning all that yourself

    continuously improving all of them

    and what matter's most DOABLE

  • over 2 years ago

    Hi Sarah,

    Whether living on your own is "hard" depends on what you do and don't struggle with.  I like living alone, but then my autism makes me ultra independent.  I struggle to ask for help with anything. And it means I don't have to put up with other people's mess and noise and anything else that upsets my sensory system.

    Whether or not it's right for you is something you won't know until you try.  That said, you maybe don't have to take on everything all at once with a big dramatic move out with no support thereafter.  Can you talk to your family?  I bet they worry about it for you too and might be able to help you build up the skills or find solutions for the aspects of it that are your biggest concerns.  Shopping for instance - online delivery?

    Just remember it's your skills not YOU that need improving.  You are a whole person as you are.  Skills are something we all spend a live time acquiring and improving upon.

  • over 2 years ago

    Living on your own isn't the scary part, I like it. Nobody messing around.

    To be able to afford it is a problem. I just lost a job, and UC isn't enough to cover even the rent.

    So, if you have a stable job, and you think you will stay there than there is nothing to worry about