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Support thread for those of us with partners/spouses with ASC-all welcome

we r the auties
over 11 years ago

Hello. I've been chatting to some ladies on here who are struggling in their relationships with partners who have Aspergers or high function Autism and I've noticed there seems to be a need for support. I am in the same situation and my partner and I have a little boy aged 5, who is also on the spectrum. Life has been very tough for a few years, but my partner and I have just started counselling.

I am hoping some others will hop on board so we can all share info and experience and support each other.

I haven't intended it to be exclusively for ladies by the way.

Love Rosemary xx

Parents
  • over 11 years ago

    Hiya,

    Thank you so much for reading my comments.  It's so good to be able to just have a place where I can talk with people who can understand my frustrations.  I have bent my friend's ears for a while now and whilst theydo try to suggest things, they really don't  understand.

    Sadly, my partner would never come to counselling with me as he would think it is only for others and we wouldn't need it.  I will however look into it for myself although as you say it's not easy to access for adults.

    Bluegem, I totally understand where you are coming from and how you must feel very confused and frustrated.  Having re-read your comments, some things ring very true to my story as well.  I would like to believe that our partners actions do come from Autism/Aspergers and not from cruelty.  My partner recently supported me through a very major operation and slow recovery.  He truly provided ALL the practical things I needed throughout as he always does  BUT...the only thing missing was an emotional connection about the huge impact it had and is still having on my life. Sadly, he has little grasp about feelings and emotions or if he has he really can't express them apart from getting exasperated with people! 

    My partner and I met in our 50's and he also has a very small circle of friends and prefers not to socialise outside of the people he feels safe with.  

    I do hope that reading this has made you feel less isolated and you know someone else out here has a very similar relationship.  I also hope that you are recovering well and can spend just a little time nurturing yourself as well as everyone else.

    XX

Reply
  • over 11 years ago

    Hiya,

    Thank you so much for reading my comments.  It's so good to be able to just have a place where I can talk with people who can understand my frustrations.  I have bent my friend's ears for a while now and whilst theydo try to suggest things, they really don't  understand.

    Sadly, my partner would never come to counselling with me as he would think it is only for others and we wouldn't need it.  I will however look into it for myself although as you say it's not easy to access for adults.

    Bluegem, I totally understand where you are coming from and how you must feel very confused and frustrated.  Having re-read your comments, some things ring very true to my story as well.  I would like to believe that our partners actions do come from Autism/Aspergers and not from cruelty.  My partner recently supported me through a very major operation and slow recovery.  He truly provided ALL the practical things I needed throughout as he always does  BUT...the only thing missing was an emotional connection about the huge impact it had and is still having on my life. Sadly, he has little grasp about feelings and emotions or if he has he really can't express them apart from getting exasperated with people! 

    My partner and I met in our 50's and he also has a very small circle of friends and prefers not to socialise outside of the people he feels safe with.  

    I do hope that reading this has made you feel less isolated and you know someone else out here has a very similar relationship.  I also hope that you are recovering well and can spend just a little time nurturing yourself as well as everyone else.

    XX

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