Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello. I've been chatting to some ladies on here who are struggling in their relationships with partners who have Aspergers or high function Autism and I've noticed there seems to be a need for support. I am in the same situation and my partner and I have a little boy aged 5, who is also on the spectrum. Life has been very tough for a few years, but my partner and I have just started counselling.
I am hoping some others will hop on board so we can all share info and experience and support each other.
I haven't intended it to be exclusively for ladies by the way.
Love Rosemary xx
Optomistic - I get what you are saying - its something I muse on every single day.
"What behaviour is down to the Aspergers and what is down to personality???" Its an unfathomable question I think, because the 2 are inextricably linked. And of course, you can also chuck into the mix the experiences of upbringing and childhood - the nature/nurture debate. In my partner's case, I suspect these are quite important in making him the man he is.
My partner has not got a diagnosis. What did you have to do to get yours? Our little boy has a full statement of SEN and all the professionals involved believe he has high function or aspergers. This was written into his statement reports. We are on the [huge!] waiting list for assessment and I have been advised by our local autism team that he definitely will get a positive diagnosis. I know my little boy has it and I have known for about 2 years now.
Yesterday, I received a letter with an appointment and it sounds like it is the start of the assessment process AT LAST!
It was only when I started to realise something was amiss and began reading up on ASC that I saw with a jolt of recognition, that my partner had more markers than my little boy. We are having couples counselling with a counsellor who has had some training. 3rd session tomorrow.
I could bang on for hours about the whole personality and can they help it or not, thing. Its a very relevant issue for us right now, as my partner has been pretty amazing this week [since session no.2 last week], which makes me think he must be able to control how he behaves. Its all very weird and difficult to understand.
Did you go through the "is it ASC or is he just a swine?" angst??? Because believe me, some of the things that my partner has said and done [and not said and done!] are pretty awful.
Spk soon. Love Rosemary xx