Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello guys!
My name is Patrick. I'm 25 (26 next month), and I am someone considered as High-Functioning Autisic.
I have been struggling with my identity for a little bit even thought I was diagnosed at the age of four.
I went to a mostly all boys private school that was designed for people with autism (or any other learning/neruological disability), and pretty much since leaving at 18, I haven't really been with a group of people that were "autistic." I still have some really close friends that I have from that school that I still keep in touch with to this day and I have no problems talking about my autism with anyone. However, I feel like I'm stuck in this bizarre limbo where on one hand, because I pass as neurotypical, people will not recognise my diability or try to avoid that it exists. But on the other, if I come out as someone who is neurodivergent, people treat me really differently to the point where I know that they are thinking 'oh he has a disability. we gotta take care of him.' It's kind of one of the reasons why I still feel iffy about talking about it cause I feel that people won't believe my diagnosis from the autistic community, but people will treat me different from the neurotypical side.
Does anyone else feel like this or experiences this as well? If so, how do you deal with it?
By the way, I understand me being able to "pass as neurotypical", is something that I do take for granted because I know people wish they can be like that as well. I don't mean to ruffle any feathers, and I hope you don't see this as me exploiting my privilege.
Hiya everyone!
Thank you all so much for your replies. It really means the world to me that I'm not the only one that feels this way
Be yourself enjoy mixing with autistic and non-autistic's you can learn from both.
I get that quite a bit. I was raised as neurotypical and so am able to get on well with many neurotypicals and like u say some dont get it when i say i am on the spectrum but how can they?
one of the worst parts of being able to mix easily with normal people is that some people can react really weird when they find out you are autistic ,, eg stop speaking to you ! that i cant understand at all. You where speaking to me yesterday what changed !
Keep and cherish your friends they are valuable.
if you can pass as neurotypical that is not a bad thing.
Hiya.
Be who you are. Navigate the world anyhow you like and be amongst like minded people here. No judgement.
What can I say? I'm 56 and waiting for an assessment. Think I've been passing somehow all my adult life. Whatever they say in my assessment; Apsergic, sub-spectrum with traits, some other SPD??? I know I'm dyslexic already....I'm going to totally live it as me now and seek my answers my way. It's all anyone can do.
Patrick, I think everyone I know who is Neurodivergent feels the same way. I don't socialise much these days so the problem doesn't come up, I'm open about my divergence but chatting in creative circles neurodivergense is pretty much the norm.
Sometimes i wish i could pass as an NT but however hard i try it becomes obvious by peoples reactions that i am not . If i could i would only tell a couple people that i really trusted . I don't think people in general think i am autistic ,just an odd loner who wants to be left alone .
Hi O,
I completely understand and I’m glad I’m not the only one feeling this
Hi,
I'm newly diagnosed since march this year with ASD/C noted with "classic case of Aspergers" on my report. I'm 22 so I know what you mean when you talk about being 'NT passing' I've been doing it for as long as I can remember but I never knew that what I was doing was 'unnatural' I always thought everyone was faking the way there were acting and were putting as much effort in as I was.
I don't really know how to introduce myself anymore in the sense of if I should say I'm an aspie/autistic person or not and moving forwards in my life, how and when I should talk about my autism.