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Newly Diagnosed and confused

Markochef65

Hi I am Mark,

I am 55 years old, I had an ASD assessment in March 2021. At the end of the assessment, I was diagnosed with autism (HFA).

I am currently finding it very difficult to understand my whole situation? I dont really know what is a "normal" feeling / reaction to everything about my diagnosis, especially from trying to get an insight from online sites and research on ASD, for example, im wondering is it true? I feel very confused and lonely?  what is it that I do differently than others? strengths! What strengths? what weakness do people see? over analysing things? very self critical, frustration! No confidence in myself! How do I change?
Are these feelings normal? I just need to understand a way forward for me. I still have not received the diagnosis report, which might give me an insight in a direction to go?
It is so difficult when you have been automatically just doing things your own way to cope for so long!
(without realising that, that is what I have been doing)
I am not an avid reader so the books that have been reccomende are not easy for me to absorb so I dont really read, if that makes sense?
Blogs or "My Stories" I read online dont seem to relate to "ME", or at least that is my perception.? Is this a normal reaction?
I have always felt the odd one out or not fitting in! Even now, I am saying to myself I dont even "fit in" in the ASD community!
Is this a normal reaction?
Apologies for ranting on, but at least I am seeking help or at least understanding for myself, something I would never have done prior to my diagnosis. I am happy I had the assessment and I am ok with the diagnosis, but it has opened so many questions and to be honest I do feel a bit frightened about it! Is this a normal feeling / reaction?
I know I am fine, I know there is help, I know worries pass etc. Its just how I feel at this moment in time. I know in an hour it will have passed. But I also know it will come back?
I just feel confused!
Thank you for listening...
Parents

  • Hi, I was diagnosed in February at 59 years of age, so you're not alone. There is no 'correct way' of being autistic, everyone is different and everyone's traits and experience of being autistic will be unique. There are commonalities between autistic people, obviously, otherwise we would not have the diagnosis. For example I have never flapped my hands or rocked, not even as a child, though many autistics find these stims are important to them. I can and do make eye-contact, though it is conscious and a learned behaviour, and do not find it particularly difficult or overwhelming.  So, don't feel that you don't fit in if your traits are not typical.

Reply

  • Hi, I was diagnosed in February at 59 years of age, so you're not alone. There is no 'correct way' of being autistic, everyone is different and everyone's traits and experience of being autistic will be unique. There are commonalities between autistic people, obviously, otherwise we would not have the diagnosis. For example I have never flapped my hands or rocked, not even as a child, though many autistics find these stims are important to them. I can and do make eye-contact, though it is conscious and a learned behaviour, and do not find it particularly difficult or overwhelming.  So, don't feel that you don't fit in if your traits are not typical.

Children