Another oldie

I have got to 58 having lived quite a traumatic life.  I have finally decided to get a formal assessment to see if the fact that I cannot successfully inrteract socailly is a neurodivergent issue or, alternatively, I am just a horrible person.  

Having opened the box is far more terrifying than I ever imagined.  As with Pandora, shutting the box does not seem to be an option.

  • Well, if it makes you feel any better, I too am facing up to the same as you, and at 60, it’s a very unsettling discovery to come to terms with. Thinking that you may be a horrible and unnatural person is not easy to get to grips with. And I’m sure you’re neither. So, good luck to you, and let’s hope we may both find some relief and help. 

  • here is my plan thingy and notes. best of luck in your mission Slight smile

    Make a list of reasons why u think u are autistic.

    include blood relatives in your family who are autistic or adhd or called weird/different

    and a list of occasions when u have been called weird, autistic, different

    the list should be electronic ie so you can email it to anyone who wants it.

  • Thanks Ben, I am feeling my age lately.

  • It seems we have age and the newness of this experiecne in common.  I hope it provides the information you need.

  • Funny you should say that, so tiring.  A friend's son has autism (he is an adult now) and I remain the only person with whom he finds it easly to engage.  If only neuro normal's sued their social interatcion super powers for good rather than evil.  They could forgive the things I cannot do, but I guess not.

  • You are right, social interaction is so exhausting.  It is such a relief to close the door and drop all of one's guards.  Beign with people is so tiring.

  • I wouldn't have thought you were a horrible person. If you were would you even be considering a diagnosis and learning to understand yourself? 

    Social interaction is exhausting at times. 

    Make sure you try to get support- opening the autism box can mean that there is work to do and things to learn. I'm sorry it feels terrifying to you! 

  • Welcome to the forum!

    I cannot successfully inrteract socailly is a neurodivergent issue or, alternatively, I am just a horrible person.  

    I'm aspie - 'normal' people are very tiring to deal with - however I find others like me are easy to talk to - we tend to have interesting hobbies and special subjects to share with others.  

  • Hi. I'm 56 and going through this too for different reasons.

    I very much doubt that you are a "horrible" person.  A horrible person couldn't nor wouldn't even ask themselves that question.  

    And, yes.  It's scary, but you aren't alone.

  • Gosh, this place is beginning to look like the Derby and Joan club.

    Welcome!

    Ben - a bona fida OAP