Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi just joined. Hoping to glean as much information as possible to help my daughter. It’s been a tough 7 years with all sorts of diagnoses which didn’t quite fit. The thing I am most bitter about is the fact that psychiatrists, following guidelines, are told that eye contact is the be all and end all. I tried for years to get them to acknowledge her autistic traits but was always told her eye contact was fine. How come I could do a 2 second google search to find out that eye contact is NOT the be all and end all. I’m so utterly devastated for her. She’s been on antidepressants and ended up on quetiapine which is a disgusting drug which just made her into a zombie and left her very overweight and with dreadful reflux. And I had to take her out of school at 15 because she couldn’t cope. She couldn’t even write her name anymore when she left school as she was so damaged. So she has no qualifications and no confidence still to even think about it. She can’t work because she can’t commit. Just day to day life is hard doing nothing. I’m hoping the diagnosis will help but it’s only been a couple of weeks.
Hello
My daughter was diagnosed with ASD this August just before her 20th birthday. Her symptoms were only obvious around her later years in Senior School, but a classic case of masking. We made our case to the GP, who took it seriously but the wait for an assessment via the NHS was unbearable and after a disastrous first attempt at starting Uni we needed her to be diagnosed quickly. So, we went private at a cost of about £900, it was worth it as with this diagnosis she has been offered amazing support from the Uni as well as getting DSA, but a lot of what was offered we didn't actually need.
So, we have the qualifications and now a chance at Uni, but like your daughter the anxiety is an issue that needs medication and is probably going to be a hurdle come employment. Keep trying and encouraging her, there are some really understanding employers out there who are happy to accommodate. My daughter was turned down by Tesco's ha ha, but found a job in a small shop who have bent over backwards to ensure she is ok.
Please don't lose hope, there are some good local groups for support too, you might need to ask your local council for the contacts.I f you can manage to dedicate the time, we went out together, took photos, did jigsaws!! tried anything to distract from anxiety becoming a deeper more complex problem. Luckily the worst bit of the anxiety is over, but it never goes away and she is having therapy for her OCD .
Ask your local college for support with access to education, you may need to go with her , that's what we did when she started Uni this year - I sat in the cafe for a week reading a book!
Please ask your GP for some therapy if you think she is damaged from school, also check out any autism workshops in your area. I wish you loads of luck with everything. BTW, eye contact isn't everything.
Thanks so much for your insight. I also sat in my car reading a book for a week outside school once! I think the anxiety is definitely worse in the teenage years. An awful difficult time for them. Lots of luck to you guys too.