Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi, I'm new. New to this forum and new to thinking about autism beyond what I've seen on tv or heard on the radio.
I have a 2.5yr old son. Talking to his key stage worker (KSW) at his nursery yesterday I asked what they mean when they say "you know what he's like". What is he like? I asked. We only have one child so I have no frame of reference.
His KSW casually said that my son can have emotional reactions to situations which are disproportionate considering his good language/communication skills, and that can be a sign that he is on the autism spectrum.
He said it was 'something to look out for' or 'keep an eye on', I forget which.
So now I'm trying not to project this throwaway comment onto him and I'm frankly a bit confused about what to look out for and how to look out for it and what to do if I notice it.
My son is generally a happy, affectionate, articulate little boy. Should I just forget the conversation or will I potentially help him in the long run by assuming he may be on the spectrum?
Any advice greatly appreciated.
Tim.
Hi NAS39236
Welcome to the forum.
I understand that the comment made by your son's KSW has caused you concern. I just want to signpost some general information about autism in the hope that it is helpful for you or the nursery.
You may like to read our general information about autism - http://www.autism.org.uk/about-autism/autism-and-asperger-syndrome-an-introduction/what-is-autism.aspx
You may also want to look at our section that provides advice for parents, relatives and carers of people with autism - http://www.autism.org.uk/living-with-autism/parents-relatives-and-carers.aspx
You may want to pass on information about teaching young children on the autism spectrum - www.autism.org.uk/.../teaching-young-children.aspx
Hope this helps,
Nick-Mod
As autism is a spectrum condition your son could be autistic but demonstrate his autistic tendencies more subtlety. For example, I was diagnosed at age 33 and my younger brother is starting the assessment process at age 28. If you look back now there are lots of moments when both of us demonstrated autistic tendencies as children but because these weren't strong enough to cause major issues at school, and my mum didn't know anything about autism, so we didn't receive any support or caused anyone any concern.
It sounds like a sensible to go back to this person and for further clarification.
Thanks for the reply. This is the first time it has crossed our minds. If anything, up to now people have been telling us his communication was advanced. We consider him to be sensitive, and he can be shy with new people but warms to them in his own time.
One example his KSW gave was of him getting very upset by a locked gate despite it being explained to him and him having the skills to discuss it. Apparently he was inconsolable for a short while just because it was locked.
He will get briefly upset when asked to do something he doesn't want to do. For example we are potty training him. He's doing well at it but will throw a mini tantrum when asked if he wants to sit on the potty (that 0-60 response over something minor was another example by his KSW). But he's very easily persuaded with a toy or the promise of watching Hey Duggee. We just assumed this was typical 2yr old behaviour.
I'll talk to his KSW again as you suggest. Please let me know if you have any more thoughts on the above
Unless he flickers his hands in front of his eyes, or just abnormally wave his hands, insist on only the same certain foods, or perhaps screaming or vomiting results, As the father of an autistic son, who had no verbal communication at all at 3.5, and did not relate to other siblings, parents, or others. and you personally realise he was not "normal",and take him to your doctor. Sounds to me he is a normal child, of a parent who has to leave him with others to go to work, He probably feels threatened being in such a physically weak position at 2.5 years old, how else is he going to communicate displeasure. Make a fuss of him is my suggestion.
Hi, you describe your son as happy, affectionate and articulate, so I'm tempted to say it doesn't sound like he's on the spectrum. But it's true that people with Asperger's syndrome can be precocious regarding their speech and vocabulary.
With nothing much else to go on, I can only suggest you go back to the KSW and talk to him again about it, and try to get a bit more detail. Particularly about what is "disproportionate" about your son's emotional reactions, in his opinion. Your son is still very young, and tantrums aren't exactly rare at his age.
Is this the first time the thought he might have autism has crossed your mind, or have you had any concerns before now? How does he behave at home? My own son has autism, and his problems were clear from an early age, well before diagnosis. He had a speech delay, difficulty with eye contact and was late reaching developmental milestones. He was afraid of loud noises and ran away from the hoover and washing machine. When he was young, he showed little recognition of us as his parents and showed his interest in things by grabbing my hand (without looking at me) and placing it on the object.
If you still have concerns, there is help and advice on this website, and many books about autism out there. Remember that you know your son best.