Struggling Mum of 20 year old son with Aspergers


My first time on this site. I have a 20 year old son with Aspergers. He has just  finished 2nd year at uni and moved back in for the summer. Recently there has been a lot of conflict involving a small incident which has escalated. Everything has been blown out of proportion and he has stomped off to my ex husbands. I have tried to calm things via text but get horrible long texts back telling me all of my shortcoming. I have generally had a good relationship with him and used strategies whilst he was growing up. He says he is mature and I treat him like a child but he is Kevin the Teenager. I.have a lot of other stress going on as my mum has rapid declining dementia. Please any advice would be welcome. I feel like the worst mother in the world.