I have just had a diagnosis and feel quite confused

Hello

I feel guilty writing this as the posts I have seen relate to parents very concerned about children and by comparison my worries are very small.  I feel a bit lost though with a recent diagnosis.  I have seen a psychiatrist for some time and have a diagnosis of a psychiatirc disorder.  The time before last I saw my psychiatrist he said I am also on the autistic spectrum.  I saw him again last week and argued with him about it but he pointed out my difficuties with relationships, black/white thinking, dislike of change, poor eye contact etc.  I am now thinking maybe he is right. Outwardly my life is successful - I have a good job etc - but it is a huge struggle.  I am finding it very hard to  get my head round this though and feel like I have become a lesser person or inferior.  It seems to be a label which is all negative and which you can't recover from.  Like I say, I appreciate my problems are very mild but I would love to hear from someone in a similar position.  Now he has said it about me I can see it in one of my children and my grandfather.  Thank you

Parents
  • NAS8954 said:

    I did not receive my Asperger's diagnosis until June 2011 (well into my 40s) and had spent all my life going against what is natural for me and trying to "fit in".  Whilst it is possible to "fit in" up to a point, it is never going to be easy.  Since my diagnosis, I have been trying just to do what is natural for me and this is working: the change will not be complete in a short period because of the habit of trying to "fit in".

    Exactly.

    It's not so much about 'changing' vs 'accepting who you are', Sam, as 'struggling' (to fit in) vs 'being who you are'.

    We can learn strategies to help us cope with everyday life, but at the end of the day, we're still the same person, still autistic.

    Embrace that, and learn just to be yourself.

    Similarly to caretwo, I only received my diagnosis a couple of years ago, and am approaching 40, and so have also been struggling, against my nature, to 'fit in', all my life, but, day by day, I'm learning to just be me, it's not easy, and I still have bad days, but I'm much happier now than I ever was before my diagnosis.

Reply
  • NAS8954 said:

    I did not receive my Asperger's diagnosis until June 2011 (well into my 40s) and had spent all my life going against what is natural for me and trying to "fit in".  Whilst it is possible to "fit in" up to a point, it is never going to be easy.  Since my diagnosis, I have been trying just to do what is natural for me and this is working: the change will not be complete in a short period because of the habit of trying to "fit in".

    Exactly.

    It's not so much about 'changing' vs 'accepting who you are', Sam, as 'struggling' (to fit in) vs 'being who you are'.

    We can learn strategies to help us cope with everyday life, but at the end of the day, we're still the same person, still autistic.

    Embrace that, and learn just to be yourself.

    Similarly to caretwo, I only received my diagnosis a couple of years ago, and am approaching 40, and so have also been struggling, against my nature, to 'fit in', all my life, but, day by day, I'm learning to just be me, it's not easy, and I still have bad days, but I'm much happier now than I ever was before my diagnosis.

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