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savyb

Hi all.. 

This is the first I've posted, I'm new to here, after researching and coming to a brick wall thought I might best bet to get advice. 

So heres the story.. I'm 5 months pregnant with my first, But I have a history of Autism in my family. My younger brother, nephew and cousin. My cousin is 25 and is so bad hes in a home. I'm worried what are the chances of my child having Autism???

but I to suffer, at the age of 18 I was diagnosed with dyslexia and dyspraxia after struggling through school then to college was where I was diagnosed. 

I wonder if there are other undiagnosed illness that I may have. I struggle day to day, and think back to my child hood and when I read back my school reports, realise I may have had selective mutism in my younger years which has resulted me with these conditions I suffer with now. I was always a troubled child and very quiet and withdrawn. 

I now find it hard to be on my own, I struggle to get to place to place on my own, e.g if I had to use the bus or walk somewhere, well its something I just wouldn't do, I would make sure I would have some one with me at all times to make me feel safe. I can't even walk to the shop on my own to do my weekly shopping I have to have my husband with me at all times. I just feel so un independent. When my husband isn't around I stay in doors at all times. This has caused me a lot of depression. 

It has got so bad that my university degree is struggling, I will not attend unless its the days my husband is in, as he attends partly the same course as me. This has been going on for such a long time now and have missed endless opportunities because of it. I have no idea if its part of mental illness I haven't been diagnosed with like autism. I worry for my unborn child and if all these could effect him when hes born and possibly be autistic and go undiagnosed. 

I'm just not sure where to turn for advice and information on these matters, and thought I would share my problem here.

I hope you can understand my situation as I've tried my best to explain as much as I could.  

Thank you, 

Sam  

Parents

  • Hi Sam,

    There is quite a bit of information on diagnosis on this site, and other people will be able to help you and share their experiences better than I can.

    But I just wanted to say this: if I were you, I would try not to worry so much about your child and whether or not s/he will be Autistic.  Autism is not a mental illness - in fact, it's not any kind of illness.  It's a condition, a different way of seeing and relating to the world.  Of course there are problems that come along with it (as you will know from your own family), but there are gifts too.  If you want to find someone with an in-depth knowledge of birds, or microphones, or suspension bridges, or virtually anything, look at the Autistic community.

    Supposing just for a second your child does turn out to be Autistic, perhaps even severely Autistic.  Will you love him/her any less?  Will s/he be any less of a precious gift to you?  Of course it will be hard and it will turn your life upside down; but hey, isn't that true of all parenting?

    I've never had children, but I do understand that worrying about the baby and what it will be like and how you will cope is kind of a job description for pregnant women.  But, as much as you can, I think you should try to relax and enjoy it.  You're doing one of the most amazing things in the world - don't let your worries get in the way.

Reply

  • Hi Sam,

    There is quite a bit of information on diagnosis on this site, and other people will be able to help you and share their experiences better than I can.

    But I just wanted to say this: if I were you, I would try not to worry so much about your child and whether or not s/he will be Autistic.  Autism is not a mental illness - in fact, it's not any kind of illness.  It's a condition, a different way of seeing and relating to the world.  Of course there are problems that come along with it (as you will know from your own family), but there are gifts too.  If you want to find someone with an in-depth knowledge of birds, or microphones, or suspension bridges, or virtually anything, look at the Autistic community.

    Supposing just for a second your child does turn out to be Autistic, perhaps even severely Autistic.  Will you love him/her any less?  Will s/he be any less of a precious gift to you?  Of course it will be hard and it will turn your life upside down; but hey, isn't that true of all parenting?

    I've never had children, but I do understand that worrying about the baby and what it will be like and how you will cope is kind of a job description for pregnant women.  But, as much as you can, I think you should try to relax and enjoy it.  You're doing one of the most amazing things in the world - don't let your worries get in the way.

Children
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