Confused about if my son has autism and desperate for answers

Yesterday my son's teacher called us into school and quite high handily told us that my son is failing in all areas of learning. That he get very anxious when anything changes and that he was putting his hand in his mouth all the time as a comfort I suppose. She said she had told him he can't do that as the other children had started to notice and he had stopped that behaviour. She had previously advised that he had a speech delay and he is on the list for speech and language therapy but now she has advised the waiting list is to long and we must go back to our GP and request an appointment with a padiatrician so we can been seen quickly. She advised that he is socially undeveloped and only really plays with one other boy who he is very close to and who speaks for him a lot which she say hinders his development further. She also said that he cannot follow instructions for example if she tells the children to go get there coats he will stay seated while all the other children do as instructed. He is never any trouble in the way that he doesn't have tantrums at school or at home. Now I have read here that behaviour at home and school can be different but I will be honest when I look at how he is at home to what she is describing I feel like she is talking about someone else. It doesn't seem to me like how different behaviour is described on this website. My son is very loving with his family he doesn't seem to have a lot of anxiety. He is funny likes to tell jokes and loves to play games with you sometimes he tires you out wanting to run around with you playing hide and seek and Chase. He has a couple of cousins that he loves to see and always asks to go play with them. He does worry about trying new things sometimes for example he got a new bike for Christmas and was a bit wary of it but once I took him out a couple of times he loved it. I just can't reconcile this home life with his school life. Could anyone give me an insights that would help me understand I am so upset by the whole thing. My son is only in reception and he is one of the youngest in his year. At home he shows an aptitude for his work at school in as far as he seems to understand it. Even the delayed speech came as a shock because he has always been so chatty and easy to understand at home.

Parents
  • Hello Louisville,

    Autism can effect children in vastly different ways and every child with Autism is different. He may not like the changes at school as there are many different things he has to do at school. Autistics children can often benefit from rigid routine and as part of this they like to know what will happen next. Sometimes this may mean explaining beforehand what will happen or even having a picture board showing what will happen during the day. They dont like surprises! as this can often upset them. Your routine at home will be familiar to him as this is constant so he is aware of what is likely to happen. From what you are saying there does seem to be some traits of Autism in him. I am not saying he has as there could be a myriad of things it could be. As far as speech patterns go, there are two types. Receptive speech patterns, this is how the child can relate to and understand what has been asked of him/her and expressive speech which is how well the child can express himself. these areas can be very difficult to determine because they can be linked together. for instance he may repeat what you say but may not fully understand what you have asked of him. If you have any concerns please consult your G.P now as he is at the age where interventions can be put in place to help him cope. I hope I have not worried you too much. If it helps my daughter was diagnosed with Autism when se was 4 yrs.

Reply
  • Hello Louisville,

    Autism can effect children in vastly different ways and every child with Autism is different. He may not like the changes at school as there are many different things he has to do at school. Autistics children can often benefit from rigid routine and as part of this they like to know what will happen next. Sometimes this may mean explaining beforehand what will happen or even having a picture board showing what will happen during the day. They dont like surprises! as this can often upset them. Your routine at home will be familiar to him as this is constant so he is aware of what is likely to happen. From what you are saying there does seem to be some traits of Autism in him. I am not saying he has as there could be a myriad of things it could be. As far as speech patterns go, there are two types. Receptive speech patterns, this is how the child can relate to and understand what has been asked of him/her and expressive speech which is how well the child can express himself. these areas can be very difficult to determine because they can be linked together. for instance he may repeat what you say but may not fully understand what you have asked of him. If you have any concerns please consult your G.P now as he is at the age where interventions can be put in place to help him cope. I hope I have not worried you too much. If it helps my daughter was diagnosed with Autism when se was 4 yrs.

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