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Feelings after diagnosis

chuckalicious

I, I've posted here before but since my last post I have had my asd assessment amd have all but been formally diagnosed as being on the spectrum and specifically aspergic. I have one more form to complete for my next apappointment but the person who did the assess!sent said she was certain but still needed that questionnaire done. 

Now, I've always known that I was different and that I was pretty sure I was going to be told I was on the spectrum. 

However, I had always imagined the diagnos would be a relief, allowing me to go a bit easier on myself. 

But now that I am at that point, I don't feel that at all. If anything I'm now questioning if the diagnosis is right, am I a fraud etc. My anxiety just will not give me a break. 

She also asked where I wanted to go from here. She gave me the contact details for a service which specifically helps adults with autism with things like social skills training to finding a job. And now I'm asking myself, where do I want to go with this? Do I want to get better at making lasting friendships or do I want to allow myself to be happy with how things are and not chasing somethin that inevitably won't be good for me. 

Has anyone else gone through anything like this?

I should add I'm male, 35 and married with 2 kids, who I look after full time at home. 

Thank you

Parents

  • Hi,

    Just a quick comment, after my diagnosis last year one of the autism team brought up the subject of "do you feel a fraud", I said yes. She said she commonly hears that. 

    I was also asked just when receiving the diagnosis, how I felt. I said my feelings were mixed, but basically angry at how I was treated when I had a mental breakdown in my early adult life. I am angry that I reached out for help, and if they had supported me I could have received the diagnosis much earlier in life and would have made a bigger difference.

    They said most people feel it is a releif, but I didn't really feel like that. I had also blocked out for many years problems with a abusive and difficult childhood, which are now surfacing after the diagnosis.

    Hadn't really worked out well for me, but I do wonder what future path I would have taken not having the diagnosis. Its good to know behaviours and aspects of my life is down to aspergers, and to have an insight in to that.

    Although very difficult at the moment, if I can get the support I need to deal with problems and issues from my childhood, will be better for me in long run. I hope I will have a more fuffilled life in my latter years.

    I guess for me the aspergers is like opening a door, and I am faced with another bigger door to challenge and get through. Having said that, I don't think this is typical experience 

    Random

Reply

  • Hi,

    Just a quick comment, after my diagnosis last year one of the autism team brought up the subject of "do you feel a fraud", I said yes. She said she commonly hears that. 

    I was also asked just when receiving the diagnosis, how I felt. I said my feelings were mixed, but basically angry at how I was treated when I had a mental breakdown in my early adult life. I am angry that I reached out for help, and if they had supported me I could have received the diagnosis much earlier in life and would have made a bigger difference.

    They said most people feel it is a releif, but I didn't really feel like that. I had also blocked out for many years problems with a abusive and difficult childhood, which are now surfacing after the diagnosis.

    Hadn't really worked out well for me, but I do wonder what future path I would have taken not having the diagnosis. Its good to know behaviours and aspects of my life is down to aspergers, and to have an insight in to that.

    Although very difficult at the moment, if I can get the support I need to deal with problems and issues from my childhood, will be better for me in long run. I hope I will have a more fuffilled life in my latter years.

    I guess for me the aspergers is like opening a door, and I am faced with another bigger door to challenge and get through. Having said that, I don't think this is typical experience 

    Random

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