Feelings after diagnosis

I, I've posted here before but since my last post I have had my asd assessment amd have all but been formally diagnosed as being on the spectrum and specifically aspergic. I have one more form to complete for my next apappointment but the person who did the assess!sent said she was certain but still needed that questionnaire done. 

Now, I've always known that I was different and that I was pretty sure I was going to be told I was on the spectrum. 

However, I had always imagined the diagnos would be a relief, allowing me to go a bit easier on myself. 

But now that I am at that point, I don't feel that at all. If anything I'm now questioning if the diagnosis is right, am I a fraud etc. My anxiety just will not give me a break. 

She also asked where I wanted to go from here. She gave me the contact details for a service which specifically helps adults with autism with things like social skills training to finding a job. And now I'm asking myself, where do I want to go with this? Do I want to get better at making lasting friendships or do I want to allow myself to be happy with how things are and not chasing somethin that inevitably won't be good for me. 

Has anyone else gone through anything like this?

I should add I'm male, 35 and married with 2 kids, who I look after full time at home. 

Thank you

Parents
  • Former Member
    Former Member

    Different people do take diagnosis differently. Some people find it a relief and find it explains a lot and it is liberating. Some people take it as confirmation that they are broken or defective in some way. I think LMY is on the right track in accepting yourself for what you are and accepting others for their differences. A lot of wasted effort goes on trying to change people's spots.

    One thing that might not be clear is exactly what is due to autism and what is an unwanted consequence of autism. Autism can lead to bad habits and behaviours and thought patterns and, if you want to make your life better you can try and untangle the autism from its consequences and work on those consequences whilst accepting the underlying autism.

Reply
  • Former Member
    Former Member

    Different people do take diagnosis differently. Some people find it a relief and find it explains a lot and it is liberating. Some people take it as confirmation that they are broken or defective in some way. I think LMY is on the right track in accepting yourself for what you are and accepting others for their differences. A lot of wasted effort goes on trying to change people's spots.

    One thing that might not be clear is exactly what is due to autism and what is an unwanted consequence of autism. Autism can lead to bad habits and behaviours and thought patterns and, if you want to make your life better you can try and untangle the autism from its consequences and work on those consequences whilst accepting the underlying autism.

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