Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi all,
I'm 24 years old I've thought for years I may have aspergers, but I'm really not sure if it's worth wasting my time or the doctors time, finding out. So, I thought, I'll write down a bit of what I experience here, and if you could give your opinion as to whether it sounds worthwhile?
I've always been a bit socially 'at odds' with everyone else. When I was a kid I didn't have any friends for a while, and when I did, I was terrible at maintaining friendships.. this is the same now.
I have anxiety and depression which were significantly worse when I was in primary school/high school, but I still have it now.
I bite my nails, I have facial tics, I have complex partial seizures (doc said its triggered by anxiety??) I like to rock back and forward and sideto side when i'm excited/nervous/stressed, I have dyslexia and dyscalculia.
I have one of those "no expression faces" and a somewhat "monotonous voice"
I have various interests, but only really seem to have one at a time, and when I have an interest, I like to research it a lot and gather lots of info about it and seemed to get "sucked in". Some examples are: Paganism, mental health, the universe, animals...
I've really had to learn about social situations; I'm quite good at being social but there's just some things that I can't learn, which are: not getting jokes or taking longer than the rest of the group to get the joke, being a bit "slow" in conversations, being tired out by social situations, etc.
also as for routine, I don't have strict rigid routines, but I do get irritable and angry if someone tries to change my plans for the day, or there is a big change and disrupts my day.
I also have some sensory things, like loud noises sometimes physically hurting me so I cover my ears, sometimes get panic attacks from loud noises, not liking physical touch very much, my eyes are very sensitive to light and I have my brightness on my phone and computer down to the lowest, which is still sometimes too bright, and I'm a picky eater.
But at the same time, I don't seem to get other things that i hear a lot of people with aspergers have.
Be honest, what do you think? (obviously I can't write it all down, otherwise this would be a long post!)
Hi Shay,
I'm awaiting a diagnosis from our local Asperger's service, and I too can relate to many of the things you describe. I feel socially "at odds", have done since childhood, and am certainly aware that I speak in a monotone voice in normal conversation. When I get an interest, even if short term, it becomes an obsession for that period - for example, doing some research on some apps for my phone recently, I spent several days exploring all the possible candidates. I especially seem to do this with technology, but thoroughly enjoy it too! Social situations I find difficult (even worse if a larger number of people are involved). As for routines, I get really irritable if my plans are changed, almost going into a depression sometimes. I too have many other things I recognise (6 pages worth in case my clinical psychologist needs it!), but everyone is different on the spectrum - things that might affect one person won't necessarily affect another.
I decided to ask to be referred after reading up about autism and doing the AQ test, which scored me as "autism likely", and after speaking to my sister, who works as a TA with autistic children. Although some people do decide to self-diagnose, you'll probably find that there are many on this forum who would recommend getting an official diagnosis, as I understand it can offer access to more help. I also understand that some employers will only recognise an official diagnosis, which is one of the reasons why I'm following this route, as I'm currently not working.
Be prepared for a long wait though, as many MHUs have a long waiting list, up to 18 months to 2 years (which is what I was quoted - though they did write to me last month assuring me I was still "in the system"). As True Colors says, if your doctor is hesitant, don't worry about applying a bit of pressure. My own doctor was excellent, she referred me without any hesitation, though not everyone has such a perceptive doctor.
Let us know if you proceed, and good luck!