Not sure where to start?

Hi there.

I'm new to this and find this subject (autism) all very confusing. We've always known our litttle boy (now 6) was different but over the past few days it's been confirmed. His school called us in and they have advised us that they beleive he is displaying autistic behaviour. His behaviour at home can and has been challenging but nothing that we would consider as naughty, just hard work sometimes. We've been told that at shcool he finds some lessons difficult and has left the room and gone off on his own and sat there banging his head on the wall or floor, something he has never done in our presence. This is one on trait he is displaying, he does avoid eye contact and has done for most of his life although if i say to him look into my eyes he does with ease. He's affectionate to us, to friends he knows, to our pet cat. He is (oddly enough) one of the most popular kids in his school, and with all the grown ups that know him. His after school club love him to bits, his teachers love him to bits and do on. He is not naughty at all, in fact, he is an absolute angel and has a heart of gold. All of this has been a shock to us. As i said, we sort of guessed he was different but hearing him displaying the type of behaviour he expresses at school and not at home was a shock. He's also really intelligent and this comes from the school. 

We don't know what to do, where to to etc. The school have given us a letter for his GP, we are takimg him there as soon as we can. We are getting the SENCO at the school involved (who is excellent). We just don't know what to do next?

Right now i feel like a crap dad.

Parents
  • Hi, my daughter is 11 and it's taken me until this year to try and get some help with her behaviour. She's always had obsessions with clothing and interests and always had temper meltdowns at home. She's never slept the night through and until recently was acording to her primary school a model pupil.

    She's always been highly accademic, a very high achiever which is why I feel that school never recognised any of her odd behaviours. Just like you I felt like a crap parent thinking that her issues with clothing, temper and poor sleep routine were my fault, just bad parenting and I tried every method I could to try and alter these things. Because school always said she was great, it had to be my fault.

    She started comprehensive school in September and has deteriorated rapidly, her comp have been brilliant and have recognised her issues straight away. I took her to my GP earlier this year and he told me she was displaying classic Asperger traits, I started to read up about Aspergers and it was like a light coming on for me! I'm not a crap mum at all, I just need to do things a little differently.

    You are not a crap dad, just the fact that you describe your sons behaviour as not naughty lets me know that you're a loving parent. It's fantastic that school have recognised these behaviours in your son, so take the support. I've found out since my girl left primary that she did display some different behaviours at school, but these have been ignored due to her accademic ability.

    My girl is loving, bright, bubbly and can be an absolute joy. She may have Aspergers (undiagnosed as yet) but she's still an interesting and increadible individual. All a diagnosis would mean for us is that we do things a little differently, it's also helping my daughter to understand herself better as it causes her real frustration not knowing why she can't just put clothes on and leave the house like her sister can.

    I really do wish you well and please don't be disheartened because your son may be on the autistic spectrum, it also has it's advantages (my 11 year old helps her 14 year old sister understand and complete her maths homework lol)

    Take care

    Andrea

Reply
  • Hi, my daughter is 11 and it's taken me until this year to try and get some help with her behaviour. She's always had obsessions with clothing and interests and always had temper meltdowns at home. She's never slept the night through and until recently was acording to her primary school a model pupil.

    She's always been highly accademic, a very high achiever which is why I feel that school never recognised any of her odd behaviours. Just like you I felt like a crap parent thinking that her issues with clothing, temper and poor sleep routine were my fault, just bad parenting and I tried every method I could to try and alter these things. Because school always said she was great, it had to be my fault.

    She started comprehensive school in September and has deteriorated rapidly, her comp have been brilliant and have recognised her issues straight away. I took her to my GP earlier this year and he told me she was displaying classic Asperger traits, I started to read up about Aspergers and it was like a light coming on for me! I'm not a crap mum at all, I just need to do things a little differently.

    You are not a crap dad, just the fact that you describe your sons behaviour as not naughty lets me know that you're a loving parent. It's fantastic that school have recognised these behaviours in your son, so take the support. I've found out since my girl left primary that she did display some different behaviours at school, but these have been ignored due to her accademic ability.

    My girl is loving, bright, bubbly and can be an absolute joy. She may have Aspergers (undiagnosed as yet) but she's still an interesting and increadible individual. All a diagnosis would mean for us is that we do things a little differently, it's also helping my daughter to understand herself better as it causes her real frustration not knowing why she can't just put clothes on and leave the house like her sister can.

    I really do wish you well and please don't be disheartened because your son may be on the autistic spectrum, it also has it's advantages (my 11 year old helps her 14 year old sister understand and complete her maths homework lol)

    Take care

    Andrea

Children
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