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How did I not realise my son was different?

ChewChew

Hi,

Sorry if a similar issue has been raised before.

My son is 6 and since he started nursery his teachers have been telling me that his behaviour is a bit out of the ordinary and that they thought there was something different about him and the way he acts.  I was adamant for a long time he was, for want of a better word, "normal" and only in the last 6 months have I agreed to the assessment.

He has come back as autistic (high functioning), and I seperately have been screened as high functioning and ADHD by a psychologist although I have to wait a long time for a diagnostic appointment for myself.

From hearing other peoples' struggles with getting their doctors to agree to a diagnosis for their child, not only do I feel grateful that the school pushed me to get my son assessed, but I am also worried that I didn't see anything "strange" or different with him myself.  Yes, he has quirks, but isn't everyone different?

I am his mum so surely I should have noticed that he was different.  I feel bad because I have been quite hard on him in regards to his bad behaviour at school (although he is lively, but manageable at home) and maybe all this time I should have just understood him more.

Has anyone elses' child diagnosis come the same way as mine?  It seems I am in the minority for not realising myself.  Sorry this is really long.

Parents

  • On recommendation from my assessor, Dr Trevor Powell, I got a copy of Tony Attwood's 'The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome'.

    It's interesting I suppose, and I have looked things up in there just to see what he says about Homo Aspie from a Homo Sapiens point of view. It certainly helped early on after my diagnosis, when I started to relive my life (some intense reflection there, I have to say) with the guidance of the book. It helped me to understand my life from a different point of view, and that in turn has helped me to come to terms with who I am, and, as it turns out, always was...

    I've had lots of support and insight from talking to people on here - and I think that it's probably better for me from a functional point of view, to be able to talk to others who live, rather than observe, the condition. I also like feeding in to these threads to try and help. It's a bit late in my life (it can't change the experience of the last 60 years) but that just makes me more keen to help others whose life is still to come.

    There's a lot of good information available online, but having browsed them, I'd avoid any that are American. Their approach often seems scattered, opinionated, and disunited, and compared to Tony Attwood, uninformed and uncaring. For instance, I read the other day that Aspies don't ever get married and never ever have children - the writer knew of ONE exception to her rule. It was just about as offensive an article that I could have read. Feel free to look, but be prepared for a load of waffle and boy cow poo.

    There's some good recommendations here on the NAS site, and have you checked out this site, which has a link from here?

    http://www.asd-forum.org.uk

    Our young need help in many ways, and we must do our best for them so that their life experience is better than the often quite cruel one we seniors have endured. That's what I think.

    Wish I'd had a Mum and a school like ChewChew's little one *wistful sigh* Smile

Reply

  • On recommendation from my assessor, Dr Trevor Powell, I got a copy of Tony Attwood's 'The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome'.

    It's interesting I suppose, and I have looked things up in there just to see what he says about Homo Aspie from a Homo Sapiens point of view. It certainly helped early on after my diagnosis, when I started to relive my life (some intense reflection there, I have to say) with the guidance of the book. It helped me to understand my life from a different point of view, and that in turn has helped me to come to terms with who I am, and, as it turns out, always was...

    I've had lots of support and insight from talking to people on here - and I think that it's probably better for me from a functional point of view, to be able to talk to others who live, rather than observe, the condition. I also like feeding in to these threads to try and help. It's a bit late in my life (it can't change the experience of the last 60 years) but that just makes me more keen to help others whose life is still to come.

    There's a lot of good information available online, but having browsed them, I'd avoid any that are American. Their approach often seems scattered, opinionated, and disunited, and compared to Tony Attwood, uninformed and uncaring. For instance, I read the other day that Aspies don't ever get married and never ever have children - the writer knew of ONE exception to her rule. It was just about as offensive an article that I could have read. Feel free to look, but be prepared for a load of waffle and boy cow poo.

    There's some good recommendations here on the NAS site, and have you checked out this site, which has a link from here?

    http://www.asd-forum.org.uk

    Our young need help in many ways, and we must do our best for them so that their life experience is better than the often quite cruel one we seniors have endured. That's what I think.

    Wish I'd had a Mum and a school like ChewChew's little one *wistful sigh* Smile

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