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bereavement

Marjorie195

Our daughter took her own life 5 years ago, after a long depressive illness. Mostly, I have learned to live with it. But, I hate January.

Memories, like little bolts of lightening, have been striking. 

We have just had the best christmas for many years, with our son and new daughter in law. I was happy for while.

But it was not like christmas was years ago, the four of us happy together.

Our brand new beautiful christmas bauble was shattered, as though we had dropped it when we took down the tree.

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  • I also lost someone I loved around Christmas, and I know what you mean about feeling sad around anniversaries and meeting their friends. To lose a child in this way is the most heartbreaking loss I can think of, so my condolences.

    I went for one session of counselling after my bereavement, but did not find this particular counsellor helpful, so didn't go back. He asked things I thought were totally irrelevant, like "how would you have liked this situation to turn out?", and "how did that make you feel?" which just made me want to punch him. This may just have been this style of counselling though, he was of the "reflective listening" school - there are many different types. 

    What helped me the most was taking on a very overgrown allotment, which gave me something to focus on for 30+ hours a week. 

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  • I also lost someone I loved around Christmas, and I know what you mean about feeling sad around anniversaries and meeting their friends. To lose a child in this way is the most heartbreaking loss I can think of, so my condolences.

    I went for one session of counselling after my bereavement, but did not find this particular counsellor helpful, so didn't go back. He asked things I thought were totally irrelevant, like "how would you have liked this situation to turn out?", and "how did that make you feel?" which just made me want to punch him. This may just have been this style of counselling though, he was of the "reflective listening" school - there are many different types. 

    What helped me the most was taking on a very overgrown allotment, which gave me something to focus on for 30+ hours a week. 

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