Still waiting for diagnosis of ASD but now have CFS :(

Sez said:

Well they saw I lie about everything when I don't lie about anything at all not that type of person. 

I eeally don't know its a diffucult suitation to be in and the GP was persuading me to call my mum so I did but wish I hadnt would have been very difficult for me to get to hospital otherwise. 

When was at the hospital I told my mum to go she didn't listen she stayed kept saying things like ' its so late you lying eg eg with swear words and kept looking at me in really evil way turns out I was very very ill and my mum does not know how ill I was still not 100 % only my GP and the hospital know 

my GP does keep everything confidental and she won't tell my mum without asking me first 

its so strange though as my parents write letters to my GP saying they should be involved in my care ( that's not right ) I'm a adult right if anyone knows any info on this plz let me know ? 

My gp always tell me if my parents have contacted her and says to me do you want me to let your parents know what's going on and how you are - I say ok almost always 

this gets me so so DOWN and DEPRESSED !

I have been thinking a lot about the relationship you have with your mother. There is something I want to share with you, in the hope that you will come to understand that your mother does love you very much.

I had a daughter, who became very ill with depression. I did not know that I had asd and I think she did too.

You say that your mother looked at you in a really evil way. People with asd often have alexithymia too. This is emotional blindness. It means that we only recognise the simple emotions in others, the complex ones and mixed feelings are hidden from us. If your mother was tired and very distressed about you being ill, and trusting that your doctor knows what he/she is doing, then she was possibly trying to fight back tears, to be strong for you.

As a mother, I know how much we want our children to be happy, healthy and getting on with life. We love our children as much as we love ourselves and spend our lives putting their needs before our own. We are also human, with all the frailties that brings. We get tired and cross and over emotional. When we are angry with our children, we still love them. Sometimes we get frustrated by our inability to help our children, they may see and misinterpret this, but beneath it is an undying love, that is sometimes difficult to show when relationships get stressed.

I have been depressed and know what it is like to be disbelieved. Your doctor may think that the things you say are as a result of your illness, rather than reality. Your mother may accept what your doctor says is true. Doctors are suposed to be experts, but can misunderstand their patients, or believe that the patients thoughts are disturbed by illness. It is difficult for your mother to know what or who to believe.

It is confusing and distressing for both of you. She wants what is best for you in the long term and may think that your doctor knows best, this means she loves you and cares about your long term future, even if she is getting it wrong.

When my daughter was ill, things became strained between us. I did not know what to do or say that would help. She lived away from home, so I rang her daily, but could not find words that would bridge the gap and help. We helped financially, but she buried her true feelings within and did not speak about the things which really hurt her, such as the breakdown of her relationship. This is another aspect of alexithymia. We do not recognise our own feelings and as a result, do not deal with them. Our pain remains locked away out of sight and distorts our thinking. Until we seek out and deal with that pain, we cannot be happy.

Sez said:

Well they saw I lie about everything when I don't lie about anything at all not that type of person. 

I eeally don't know its a diffucult suitation to be in and the GP was persuading me to call my mum so I did but wish I hadnt would have been very difficult for me to get to hospital otherwise. 

When was at the hospital I told my mum to go she didn't listen she stayed kept saying things like ' its so late you lying eg eg with swear words and kept looking at me in really evil way turns out I was very very ill and my mum does not know how ill I was still not 100 % only my GP and the hospital know 

my GP does keep everything confidental and she won't tell my mum without asking me first 

its so strange though as my parents write letters to my GP saying they should be involved in my care ( that's not right ) I'm a adult right if anyone knows any info on this plz let me know ? 

My gp always tell me if my parents have contacted her and says to me do you want me to let your parents know what's going on and how you are - I say ok almost always 

this gets me so so DOWN and DEPRESSED !

I have been thinking a lot about the relationship you have with your mother. There is something I want to share with you, in the hope that you will come to understand that your mother does love you very much.

I had a daughter, who became very ill with depression. I did not know that I had asd and I think she did too.

You say that your mother looked at you in a really evil way. People with asd often have alexithymia too. This is emotional blindness. It means that we only recognise the simple emotions in others, the complex ones and mixed feelings are hidden from us. If your mother was tired and very distressed about you being ill, and trusting that your doctor knows what he/she is doing, then she was possibly trying to fight back tears, to be strong for you.

As a mother, I know how much we want our children to be happy, healthy and getting on with life. We love our children as much as we love ourselves and spend our lives putting their needs before our own. We are also human, with all the frailties that brings. We get tired and cross and over emotional. When we are angry with our children, we still love them. Sometimes we get frustrated by our inability to help our children, they may see and misinterpret this, but beneath it is an undying love, that is sometimes difficult to show when relationships get stressed.

I have been depressed and know what it is like to be disbelieved. Your doctor may think that the things you say are as a result of your illness, rather than reality. Your mother may accept what your doctor says is true. Doctors are suposed to be experts, but can misunderstand their patients, or believe that the patients thoughts are disturbed by illness. It is difficult for your mother to know what or who to believe.

It is confusing and distressing for both of you. She wants what is best for you in the long term and may think that your doctor knows best, this means she loves you and cares about your long term future, even if she is getting it wrong.

When my daughter was ill, things became strained between us. I did not know what to do or say that would help. She lived away from home, so I rang her daily, but could not find words that would bridge the gap and help. We helped financially, but she buried her true feelings within and did not speak about the things which really hurt her, such as the breakdown of her relationship. This is another aspect of alexithymia. We do not recognise our own feelings and as a result, do not deal with them. Our pain remains locked away out of sight and distorts our thinking. Until we seek out and deal with that pain, we cannot be happy.