Identifying what is and what isn't autism

It doesn't sound very nice. Unfortunately the lack of any real understanding of autistic spectrum in the workplace means that available Triad-based guidelines don't do justice to all the problems faced.

The notion they suppose themselves able to determine what's down to autism and what isn't suggests they don't think autism is the issue. It doesn't tend to help much disclosing autism.

There are some books that might help. Malcolm Johnson's "Managing with Asperger Syndrome" (Jessica Kingsley Publishers 2005) is based on the author's experience in a sales management context. It isn't very clear if the author's autistic spectrum characteristics are that marked, and it does get too bogged down in autobiography. The Sheffield - Adults Speak out about Asperger Syndrome Series "Asperger Syndrome and Employment - Adults speak out about Asperger Syndrome" edited by the late Genevieve Edmonds and Luke Beardon (Jessica Kingsley Publishers 2008). there are 15 personal experience anecdotes, a better spread of experience, and commentary by the editors.

I survived work both in industry and academia and am now retired. It was immensely difficult with one issue after another. Mostly I managed, but certain issues regularly cropped up. I also got bullied from time to time.

I cannot deal with cliques, or people who expect undue deference. I really haven't a clue what they expect or are on about.

I manage communication on a "one size fits all basis" - that is I cannot really adapt much when speaking to more senior or more junior. I have often been accused on not speaking appropriately to my position.

I get into personality clashes, often from misunderstanding humour. I don't seem to judge things like social distance properly, being in people's faces, or crossing social gaps. I often talk "off the wall" going from almost mentally absent to right in on-the-ball.

I get confused and disorientated if a meeting is noisy and disorderly. Under stress I become less coherent at explaining things and repeat myself. I also fail to hear properly what is being said. That tended to lead to being made fun of.

While being good at detailed and painstaking work, I miss out certain aspects of the tasks completely, just a total inexplainable blank. Also there are certain things I'm mysteriously not good at.

I'd challenge any employers to work out how much of that is down to autism.

What I did find was that consistently my accusers of my being difficult etc. had no real case for me to answer. All I had to do was stand my ground and ask to see the evidence. Invariably the evidence turned out to have no substance whatsoever - hearsay, one off incidents overly emphasised, things from years back dug up again and again. Just some people didn't like working with me because I came over a bit strange occasionally. Unfortunately there are always people in workplaces who think its their duty to root out weakness.

If companies realised just how much time such people waste, and how much damage they do to productivity, we would all get along much better. Unfortunately they never got the retribution they lined up for me, so it was usually the same accusers back for another try.

I suspect therefor the line managers making an issue about your husband are out to make trouble, and all you have to do is ask to see their evidence.

It doesn't sound very nice. Unfortunately the lack of any real understanding of autistic spectrum in the workplace means that available Triad-based guidelines don't do justice to all the problems faced.

The notion they suppose themselves able to determine what's down to autism and what isn't suggests they don't think autism is the issue. It doesn't tend to help much disclosing autism.

There are some books that might help. Malcolm Johnson's "Managing with Asperger Syndrome" (Jessica Kingsley Publishers 2005) is based on the author's experience in a sales management context. It isn't very clear if the author's autistic spectrum characteristics are that marked, and it does get too bogged down in autobiography. The Sheffield - Adults Speak out about Asperger Syndrome Series "Asperger Syndrome and Employment - Adults speak out about Asperger Syndrome" edited by the late Genevieve Edmonds and Luke Beardon (Jessica Kingsley Publishers 2008). there are 15 personal experience anecdotes, a better spread of experience, and commentary by the editors.

I survived work both in industry and academia and am now retired. It was immensely difficult with one issue after another. Mostly I managed, but certain issues regularly cropped up. I also got bullied from time to time.

I cannot deal with cliques, or people who expect undue deference. I really haven't a clue what they expect or are on about.

I manage communication on a "one size fits all basis" - that is I cannot really adapt much when speaking to more senior or more junior. I have often been accused on not speaking appropriately to my position.

I get into personality clashes, often from misunderstanding humour. I don't seem to judge things like social distance properly, being in people's faces, or crossing social gaps. I often talk "off the wall" going from almost mentally absent to right in on-the-ball.

I get confused and disorientated if a meeting is noisy and disorderly. Under stress I become less coherent at explaining things and repeat myself. I also fail to hear properly what is being said. That tended to lead to being made fun of.

While being good at detailed and painstaking work, I miss out certain aspects of the tasks completely, just a total inexplainable blank. Also there are certain things I'm mysteriously not good at.

I'd challenge any employers to work out how much of that is down to autism.

What I did find was that consistently my accusers of my being difficult etc. had no real case for me to answer. All I had to do was stand my ground and ask to see the evidence. Invariably the evidence turned out to have no substance whatsoever - hearsay, one off incidents overly emphasised, things from years back dug up again and again. Just some people didn't like working with me because I came over a bit strange occasionally. Unfortunately there are always people in workplaces who think its their duty to root out weakness.

If companies realised just how much time such people waste, and how much damage they do to productivity, we would all get along much better. Unfortunately they never got the retribution they lined up for me, so it was usually the same accusers back for another try.

I suspect therefor the line managers making an issue about your husband are out to make trouble, and all you have to do is ask to see their evidence.