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Assessment or not?

Huckleberry

Hi everyone, 

I would welcome people's experience and thoughts around this. My son is 10 nearly 11 and has always exhibited a lot of Aspberger traits some of which are becoming more pronounced. I'm in two minds whether to take him to the GP after talking to the school. Only recently I realised that a lot of his physical quirks (windmill arms, hand flapping, constant bouncing when anxious or excited) are stimming. I recognised them as self-regulatory but now know that they are classic stimming. Small adjustments at school like moving his table send him into a sprial at home, though they don't see it at school any longer. Up to year three we would have incidences where he would throw furniture at school, but because it's a small school they have 'held' him well.

However he is extremley gifted in language, understanding nuances well in books and plays such as Shakepeare. He is also very very aware when others are distressed, and is caring towards others, particularly younger children. Because of this the school are saying they will not refer and think that he has normal behaviour, although he is a 'bit odd'.  They think it's a reaction to the shift to secondary. I did however read some recent research which said Aspies were very empathetic which is why they feel so overwhelmed. Someone sent me the research who knows him well. Is this research widely known? 

I'm exhausted, and my main concern is for his mental health and the distress he obviously feels so easily in a number of situations. After years my husband finally agreed to go for an assessment. However the school will not give us the support to go through Ed Psych. The school is suggesting a private counsellor for his anxiety.

I suppose what I'm asking is how long is the journey with the GP (a piece of string?), will it help to have a diagnosis, are there Aspies who are gifted in language? 

Also I'd be interested in book suggestions, I read somewhere about the traffic light system, I'm very disorganised so it would be helpful to have a book that can help me structure routines for him.

Thank you for reading this. 

  • Huckleberry said:

     Today after the original post, all of his class teased him and wound him up deliberately until he grabbed the ringleader by the hair and armlocked him. 

    I hope the vicious brute has learned his lesson, further I trust your son was not subjected to censure for having found it necessary to defend himself?  

  • Thanks so much for your response. The said that CAMHs wouldn't see him as a priority as he wasn't taking medication or self harming! Today after the original post, all of his class teased him and wound him up deliberately until he grabbed the ringleader by the hair and armlocked him. He's never done this before, he's not an aggressively violent child and I'm so frightened for him. After school he ran off in torrential rain, in his socks and hit behind the bins until his teacher and I could coax him out, he was so upset about his reaction in the incident.

    They said they can't refer as it's not affecting his academimc peformance, he's achieving well above average. So I think off to the GP it is tomorrow. 

  • Hi, there a posts on here which illustrate how our children hold their emotions in at school + then let off steam when they get home.  Some of these posts also illustrate how stressful secondary school is.  It is v different from small(ish)primary schools.   However good his school has been with him, it is obvious they haven't a clue about autism + he'll need that understanding more than ever in secondary. They are proving to be a real blockage.  You can keep a diary of your son's behaviour at home, even videoing at times if he is willing, to show the difference from being at school.  Maybe that'll make them support you but, regardless,  I think you shd ask for an assessment :  see your GP.  You can also mention CAMHS at the same time.  Many therapists don't understand autism + are expensive.  You need 1 who understands how his autism affects him as an individual but try the nhs route 1st.   Services vary throughout the country so I can't comment on how long it'll take.   Also if you do a search on here you'll find book recommendations - quite often they can be ordered from amazon.  Gd luck with everything.  Ask whatever you want + come back any timeSmile