I’m autistic and finding that health anxiety is getting harder as I get older.
I’m very aware of my body, and things like new sensations, appointments, and waiting for results can feel overwhelming. At times this feeds into a sense of hopelessness.
I’d really appreciate hearing from others who relate or have found ways of coping.
Thank you for sharing this so honestly.
A lot of what you wrote really resonated with me, especially what you said about accumulated experiences, burnout, and gradually reconnecting with yourself and your values.
I appreciate the thought and care you put into this it’s given me a lot to reflect on.
Thank you for sharing this.
I really like how organised and thorough your notebook is.
I can see how having everything in one place helps reduce overwhelm and gives you a sense of control, especially when health anxiety spikes.
I’ve been trying to find ways to steady myself too, and reading or listening to something grounding in nature helps me when things feel uncertain
A healthcare notebook (the combined physical health, mental health and neurodivergent health) via a physical ring bound A5 lined notebook - which I update and take to appointments is helpful to me, where I can note and track e.g.:
I have had health anxiety for as long as I can remember - and it’s still one of my biggest problems. I spent a lot of time in hospital as a child and that’s possibly one of the reasons it’s such an issue for me, but since realising I’m autistic I can now understand that there are myriad reasons while this would be an issue for me. I had a serious, life threatening illness in late 2021 and that left me with PTSD and terrible, extreme health anxiety that has taken me a long long time to make progress with. Only by mid 2025 was I starting to live a more normal life really. So I have so much empathy for anyone who struggles with health anxiety - because it’s an awful thing to struggle with.
I think it can get worse with age - for various reasons. The fact that we’re more susceptible to illness as we age is an easy thing to get paranoid about. Also I’ve found that the menopause increases anxiety issues. And also we can have relatives or friends that get ill or die - which again makes us more paranoid. The pandemic hasn’t helped of course. And also I think being older can make you just think more about illness and death as - let’s face it - the inevitable is nearer.
Anyway - I’ve tried lots of approaches to improving my health anxiety issues. I had NHS talking therapy over the phone for the PTSD after my illness - and that definitely helped me. Also I withdrew a lot from people for a while - and that gave me time to recover without too much ‘threat’ around me (I was very anxious for a long time about catching viruses of any kind). And then I got really into the teachings of the Buddhist Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh - and that’s possibly definitely has massively helped me. They have a thing they say : “it is the nature of being human to get sick, it is the nature of being human to die” - we cannot escape these things. We have to accept it. We try to run away from it and that just makes us more scared. Fight or flight doesn’t get rid of our fear. The only way to cure a fear is to face what we fear. The ‘running away’ only makes things worse. We will one day get sick, we will one day die. We have to accept it. That knowledge can help us to see the true value of LIFE - and make the most of the time we have. Buddhist teachings on ‘no birth, no death’ are also really fascinating. I would recommend them to anyone struggling to accept the fact that we will all one day die. Also teachings on impermanence and attachment, inter-being and ‘no self’ and ‘emptiness’. . A lot of other cultures and philosophies have a great deal to offer in helping us to face illness and mortality. Western societies are very poor in this respect - they focus on the self and the ego, and hide away death and make it a taboo subject - which increases the fear.
What helped me most was the writings and talks of Thich Nhat Hanh and Plum Village - these teachings are widely available and free on YouTube and the podcast ‘The Way Out is In’. There are lots of books and audiobooks.
We can’t escape illness and death. Obviously we can help ourselves a bit by living healthy lifestyles - but no matter how we life we will all one day get sick and die. We have to accept that - and if we can cultivate acceptance of it we will feel less fear of it. It will never be easy - but it’s not right to ruin our lives because we are constantly living in fear of something that is in the future and also inevitable. I’ve found Mindfulness very helpful - because the majority of the time we are not ill NOW. The more we can live in the present moment the less we will fear what’s in the future.
I still have health anxiety - I have bad days sometimes with it - but the things I’ve learned from Thich Nhat Hanh and Plum Village have been a massive help to me. I can now live a life that is much closer to ‘normal’ than previously. I still have a way to go and will probably always struggle a bit with it - but I have some really helpful ‘tools’ now to help me cope much better. I want to express my solidarity with everyone who struggles with health anxiety - because it’s a very unpleasant thing indeed. At times I’ve felt suicidal because if it - which is ironic really isn’t it?!
My health anxiety had lessened until a few years ago. Now it has returned with a vengeance.
I’ve been seriously ill in the past but the NHS was fantastic at that time. My anxiety now is more to do with not being able to contact my GP if the occasion arises as it’s becoming nearly impossible here; in fact there was a BBC news item a few days ago saying just this thing. I’m concerned that the emergency services will be unable to respond in a timely fashion if I’m in need and I’m worried that I will be left in a hospital corridor for days while the public walk past my trolley and stare at me lying on a urine soaked mattress or worse, because that’s what is happening in N. Ireland.
I’m anxious about getting ill but I’m trying to tell myself that I’m doing what I can and to leave what I can’t change. In my part of the woods the politicians from different parties must work together to implement policies but they spend much of there time explaining why the other parties’ proposals are ‘wrong’ so a proposal that’s beneficial can’t always be pushed through.
My anxiety in general has risen as I've aged so I do think health is just one of the things it's landed on. I've also become more aware that I'm at an age where the health issues start and because of my autism I do struggle to make healthy choices such as with diet as it's a sensory nightmare.
I hope for a day where I can share your mentality. I'd perhaps like to skip the 3 almost died experiences though.
buying a heavyweight newspaper
A second use could be to slap noisy people in the waiting room.
I had a 'minor' stroke in 2024, strangely, I was entirely calm about it. I rather think that coping happens when things do actually go wrong, it is the apprehension that we will not cope that is the problem.
The extensive series of outpatient tests that I had for about 6 months following - no direct cause was found - was the most trying for me. I found that buying a heavyweight newspaper at the hospital shop and reading it in the waiting rooms helped.
I actually worry less about my health now than I did when I was younger, I think mostly because I have very good GP's who I trust and I'm in a much much better place mentally than I was.
Also having had 3 almost died experiences enabled me to face my own mortality better, I don't want to die and I fear pain, but I know I'm mortal, I tell myself I don't need to worry and I've been dong it for so long I've actually started to believe myself.
My health anxiety was bad when I was younger, had therapy for it. One of the biggest things keeping me in the loop was asking Dr Google. Nowadays, it’s come back a bit, but it’s all related to my diet. I worry too much about what I eat. I do eat rubbish, but I try and have fruit and veg too. I’m always worried I’m going to end up having a stroke or have heart disease etc. Perfectly possible. My dad has a heart attack at 60 and his dad died of a heart attack too. I don’t want to die. I just obsess over it a bit too much. I just don’t like the texture of most veg. Crunchy veg is a no no. It has to be soft. The same with fruit. This creates a problem whereby I want to eat more healthy, but my autism related sensory issues hampers my efforts. This then creates more anxiety. The solution is a cup of tea.
Yep, had this too Lonehare12
Appear to be emerging from it myself - touch wood...
I concluded it partly down to just the sustained volume of experiences relating to ill health - that of others and accumulation of experiences myself, the social expectation of older people that they get more of this (Ok figures show that the bulk of NHS spending does go on older people). I also have to get used to my bodies ability to shrug off things like infection quickly is not as good as it used to be. Aches and pains take a little more attention for causative analysis and resolution.
So it's a bit like trying not to look at someone's nose when they tell you not to.
Also, because I was (and can still be sometimes) almost at the point of giving up and felt like I had no reason to be around tha was worth all the grief I was experiencing. I have actually actively looked for illnesses that could come along that would facilitate that for me in a socially acceptable way.
However, just last week when an NHS e-message asked me whether I still wanted the appointment I had been waiting for for 2 years - I reflected, thought, well actually, the same symptoms of renal pain from the stones I know are still there haven't recurred for 2 years and thought... No I don't need it - maybe a gamble but one I can live with and maybe that frees up resources for someone who can't.
I can't really explain with any certainty this situation in me.
However there are some of my personal circumstances worth mentioning:
I reckon that I am actually properly getting out of burnout.
I have been away from a lot of the chronic stressors that put me there to start with for long enough for me to recover.
I have accepted my vulnerabilities and those of others better.
I have used physical exercises that have helped change my posture and bearing so that I carry myself in an outwardly more confident way.
I have done a lot of the mental heavy lifting to be able to see things from a healthier perspective.
To do this I searched out and embraced support.
Crucially I reconnected to the values that closer reflect who I am and want to be.
Maybe there's something in this that can be answer for you too :-)
All the best.
my anxiety got worse as i got older also every day is a struggle
Yes my health anxiety is increasing with age. I didn't used to worry about things like that at all. Now I get quite consumed by it.
I try to rationalise it and remind myself that my thoughts aren't facts but I've definitely not mastered the coping part yet.
