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Coaching v Therapy options

NAS71657

I am looking for some general pointers-not endorsement of any one option. I am not sure whether therapy or coaching is the right route for me. I have diagnoses of Asperger's and ADHD and I contacted a provider online and was told that I would be better seeking a neurodivergent consultant. The prices are astronomical. I am bothered by intruding and disabling rumination. My current episode has lasted seven months. It relates to an event many years ago when I was 'shamed' and the issue continues to hold me back. Any advice on what the best way forward would be? I have no support network and external constraints-poor public transport connections and lack of amenities makes it difficult for me to change my circumstances.

  • Hi and welcome 

    I pay privately for psychotherapy, it's £45 per hour. I'm finding it helpful.

    I only started yesterday with a coach, I think I am entitled to 12 one hour sessions that I have to use up by March. My coach is autistic. This was a new experience for me actually talking to someone who is autistic. I have already been given some advice on how to deal with a difficult work situation.

    I am also having 6 online empower autism sessions that cover things like Assertiveness, boundaries and RSD.

    I think is you contact your local citizens advice they will give you the resources in your area. My coach and the online sessions are free.

  • If you are looping on something it's mostly because there is something you don't understand fully. You keep revisiting it to try to figure it out.

    Since you are stuck you need someone to help. This is what therapy is for. Counsellors are typically cheaper than psychologists, and price goes upm with how much experience they have. Ideally you'd like one with a ASD background or experience as it can make it easier.  It's from £50 to over £100 an hour.

    They do require you to be able to be open and talk about you issue. Note that the can't solve it, they just help you to see it in a balanced way and challenge any assumptions or biases you have.

    If you want a low cost option to help talk it through, use ChatGPT, you can get the app on your phone for free. If you just use text you can pretty much type as much as you want for nothing.

    Just type and tell it what you think. I don't ask many questions, I just write stuff like this post anf see what it says. Then just keep going. It will offer supportive comments. You can ask for other interpretations, what it suggests, etc. it does have quite good ASD knowledge, in my opinion. It also notices the right stuff (I've validated some with real trained people). But you need to know how to use it, i.e. don't have transactional simple question, but a dialogue, like talking to someone.

  • NAS71657 said:
    My current episode has lasted seven months. It relates to an event many years ago when I was 'shamed' and the issue continues to hold me back.

    Based on just this statement I would suspect this is a trauma that you have not processed and it is holding you from moving on.

    A psychotherapist would be your best tool to deal with this (the technique is called unpacking of trauma) and such a therapist costs about £50+ per hour. Expect at least a half dozen sessions - they are not cheap but they can help.

    I don't think coaching will help as the issues sound like they are internalised and you will need to resolve this first. You can discuss future treatment with the therapist if you want to look at other options - they should be happy to give you ideas that don't tie you to them if it is your wish.

    I would strongly recommend finding a therapist with a track record of helping autists as I have heard of others using inexperienced therapists and being very dissapointed at the lack of understanding.

    Sessions can easily be held by Zoom or other videconference - I am currently living in Brazil and my therapist in in Canada, but the time zone alignment makes this work well.

    These are just my thoughts on the situation - I clearly have little to work from so can only base my thoughts around that.