Teeth!

Hiya,

i wrote a long reply, but then safari crashed and it went poof. So here are the bits I remember.

What you say above is all very logical and true. I am very aware that not dealing with it now is just leaving problems for later. By not dealing with it now I know I am being I am short sighted and silly. I feel guilty / ashamed about that. My emotion (anxiety, fear) are making me act illogically (which I don't like.)

i think there are a few issues involved. I think the big 2 are:

1: communication anxiety

2: process, sensory, pacing

1: at the moment I cannot talk (have not had any speech for about a week.).  Last time I could talk when I arrived but i felt the language ability slowly drain away. By the time we got into the room I was signing but my partner who was with me (who is lovely) was struggling to interpretet.

Everyone talked really fast and I could not keep up. They told my partner stuff but said it so fast I could not understand. he then agreed to something and they started telling me things to do with no explanation of what was happening.

It was very Unpleasent before I even got to the dentistry bit. 

2: I don't know what's going to happen, what the social rules are, when to get in the chair, get out or what they even mean by 'are you comfortable'. Last time I felt an intense pressure too 'stop making a fuss' but i didn't know what they wanted. By the end I felt like a bad person who had wasted everyone's time.

There are some other factors too. Simple stuff really like the sensory side (noise, textures, cold and hot things).

Finally, The timing and pacing was really weird. Lots of time traveling, then into a waiting room (which was loud and full of things to look at, posters to read etc etc) then into the little room with the chair. Then everything is so fast.

I wonder if there is an (adult) autie friendly dentist in london.

I think, if they would be willing between me, my partner and my best friend (he also carers for me a lot) we could come up with something which would work. It's what we did for the hairdresser. 

(In brief, Mike takes me in the car, there's a really little hair salon we found. They have a guy who specialises in kids hair and he does the cut but does not use the loud buzzer. 

They know upfront I won't speak and they let me wait in a quiet place and take breaks. mike does all the social stuff I can focus on staying calm and keeping the flaps down. The guy is gentle and after the cut we leave. 

Mike pays on my behalf and then I pay him back via the Internet later)

Now I think about it, I can think of the advice I would give if someone asked me:

1: one visit for them to look, then give lots and lots of time to explain procedure and processes. What's going to happen in detail. Perhaps write it down. Make a visual progress  diagram I could refer too. (Eg I need to know if I am on step 2 of 6 or 4 of 5 etc). 

2: discuss communication issues upfront. Make sure they know before I arrive if I can speak or not and ensure that if I cannot speak they understand how AAC Is used. Eg, they won't read half complete sentences off the screen and reply before I have finished. They won't just explain it to whoever is with me and then move on before I understand. 

3: Avoid wooly language. 'Almost done" is useless. Combined with knowing the process this would massively reduce the anxiety. 

4: a break between travel, time in the small room and then traveling home. Allow for decompression.

I suppose I have answered my own question somewhat. Will point Mike at this post and see if he would be okay to help me arrange such a thing.

This is one of those things where I am lucky that people are willing to help me (Mike is awesome) But at the same time I feel a burden for asking and just keep telling myself if I just tried harder it would be fine.

Hope that makes some sense.

Jamie + Lion

jamie,

you have a choice. Follow outraged's extreme DIY methods or do something different that should be much less distressing. doing nothing isn't a great option as you end up, sooner or later, with a bigger crisis.

I had to go to the D at christmas, a tooth broke and just had to be sorted out. I dreaded it but went along, i told them how i hated going to the dentists. He promised it wouldn't hurt and it actually didn't! I think that he was a particularly good dentist but maybe they use better needles and anaesthetic nowadays. This was pre diagnosis - i think i would rationalise it better now!

you have to summon every bit of determination and logic to cope and, i was practically sobbing at the end but you can and will get through it. Cling on to your rational brain that understands that you can get through the ordeal and let them do what you know has to be done.

i took my mp3 player and earphones in and tried to concentrate on the music whilst it was happening and this helped too.

Hiya,

i struggle with my teeth. I have always struggled with teeth brushing. I don't have a solution and its a problem I am currently hiding from. I try to do them once per day. 

Last dentist visit said things needed to be done, but the dentist said she would refer to the hospital because she said it would be unsafe as I was so stimmy and non verbal that day. I know that ' put to sleep' for the dentistry work means aneathnatised, but my first semi aware understanding of what she said interpreted it as 'put to sleep' as in killing an ill animal. I got out of there fast and later that day has a panic attack. I know that's not what she meant by everytime I think about it I shudder. 

I dont think the refer was made and I have not chased It. 

So erm , yeah I have similar issues. 

Jamie + Lion

Outraged,

That sounds dreadfully painful. My teeth don't hurt but if I was you I would certainly go and see your gp, see what he or she can advise.

Good luck.

Kindest regards,

Matthew.

I have trouble remembering/bothering to do my teeth at all, and never go to the dentist. Recently, I broke my tooth. It was sufficiently uncomfortable to be debilitating yet I was unable to go to the dentist to have it removed (in part because the only dentist approached wanted to do 3 routine appointments before addressing the emergency issue) so I was forced to use cola and impact to destroy the tooth over several unpleasant months (not recommended.) 

I can visit the doctor much easier. Is it possible to access dental services from your gp? Also can anyone suggest some way by which teeth cleaning can be made less of an issue. (I think the issue is aversion to strongly flavoured minty toothpaste coupled with hypersensitivity of the gums.)

Ha, ha.

Yeah I like that smiley face as well. I guess I take after my mum, I don't think she's been to the dentist for over eighteen years now.

Stay safe Recombinantsocks.

Kindest regards,

Matthew.

Does anyone LIKE going to the dentist? I doubt it!

The point is that you can largely stop your teeth from going bad. If they start to hurt then it is probably too late to avoid the drill.

I liked your smiley face in the last post, really appropriate for a discussion on dentists!

Recombinantsocks,

Sorry about bombarding you with so many questions. I like to get everything of my mind, I hope I'm not making just general chit chat, if I am then I apologise for that. I intend to get a pen pal at some point so I can chat to someone daily, without bugging them.

Thanks for your reply, it's been years since I have been to a dentist. Not sure why but I don't really like them. My teeth never hurt so really I don't find a need to go to the dentist at all, hopefully they never will hurt. I use a normal tooh brush, not an electric though I'm sure electrics are really awesome

Stay safe Recombinantsocks. (Sorry about so many posts...)

Kindest regards,

Matthew.

Gosh Matthew, you're exploding with questions!

Doing them at night is more important than in the morning. To be honest, I do the same as you and it works for me. Like many aspies, I have an absolute phobia about going to the dentist (I guess that you hate this too?). I've learnt, from a dentist friend a long time ago, that dental floss is very useful for cleaning out bits of food and stuff from between your teeth. I now use the P shaped disposable things that you can get from Boots etc. I also use an electric brush - I'm a bit lazy and I like using electric gadgets too!

I avoided going to the dentist for a long time (about 14 years!) until my wife nagged me to go. I was astonished and delighted that I actually didn't need anything doing because of my obsessive habits with floss and the electric brush (but only once a day). (Obsessiveness can sometimes be a benefit!)

One of the reasons for you not doing them in the morning is probably because you don't like being told what to do and I bet your parents have badgered you to do this? There is a bit in our syndrome that makes us rebel against being told what to do. Did you know that?