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Never Feeling Truly Content

SJH1994

So am quite new here, and made my introductory post the other day.

Is it a typical autistic trait to never feel completely content, I feel this way pretty much everyday, and there is always something in the back of my head either frustrating me, irritating me or just generally upsetting or worrying me, I admit that some days can be worse than others, and when it gets very bad it can lead to meltdowns, other days it can be quite distant and doesn't affect me too badly, but there is never a time when its not there. It usually leads to mental exhaustion while I'm at work, and I always have to take a little while to sit away somewhere and give my head a rest to rebuild energy-fortunately I'm in the position at work where I am left to my own devices so can do this If I want too. 

I was wondering if this is a common trait of Autism, and if anyone experiences the same or similar?

Parents
  • SJH1994 said:
    Is it a typical autistic trait to never feel completely content,

    From conversations I have had with NTs it is clear to me that contentment is something incredibly few people have.

    The only cases I believe to be realistic are for those who have pretty much abandoned the trappings of the material life and become either monks / religious devouts or have gone back to a live much closer to nature.

    For those of us in contact with any sort of media we are constantly told we need to have this product to be happy, that body (achievable through their diet plan) or to be on a career path that they can sell us a course on being able to do.

    Add the fakery of social media where everyone seems to be trying to show how successful they are (or at least look like they are) and what a wonderful life they are living (that only took 6 takes to get the right photo after borrowing the must-have accessory to complete their look.

    I've learned to let go of the whole social media scene and care much less about having the must-have clothes / accessories / phone / car etc. This goes a long way to feeling content.

    Knowing yourself, your limits and potential is another big part of it too - my therapist spent a lot of time with me on this and I do feel much happier with myself now and can be content with being all alone with my thoughts when needed.

    As for work - making the mental switch to keeping it as a transactional thing worked for me. This is a bit more complex to explain but I stopped giving them 10-15 hours of my time through working on my commute and late into the evenings every week. I wasn't paid for it so they didn't get it.

    Learning how to compartmentalise the stresses of work when you leave is a great tool too - the therapist can teach this too. You can then relax on the commute to read / listen to music and make it a pleasant or productive time - great for mental health.

Reply
  • SJH1994 said:
    Is it a typical autistic trait to never feel completely content,

    From conversations I have had with NTs it is clear to me that contentment is something incredibly few people have.

    The only cases I believe to be realistic are for those who have pretty much abandoned the trappings of the material life and become either monks / religious devouts or have gone back to a live much closer to nature.

    For those of us in contact with any sort of media we are constantly told we need to have this product to be happy, that body (achievable through their diet plan) or to be on a career path that they can sell us a course on being able to do.

    Add the fakery of social media where everyone seems to be trying to show how successful they are (or at least look like they are) and what a wonderful life they are living (that only took 6 takes to get the right photo after borrowing the must-have accessory to complete their look.

    I've learned to let go of the whole social media scene and care much less about having the must-have clothes / accessories / phone / car etc. This goes a long way to feeling content.

    Knowing yourself, your limits and potential is another big part of it too - my therapist spent a lot of time with me on this and I do feel much happier with myself now and can be content with being all alone with my thoughts when needed.

    As for work - making the mental switch to keeping it as a transactional thing worked for me. This is a bit more complex to explain but I stopped giving them 10-15 hours of my time through working on my commute and late into the evenings every week. I wasn't paid for it so they didn't get it.

    Learning how to compartmentalise the stresses of work when you leave is a great tool too - the therapist can teach this too. You can then relax on the commute to read / listen to music and make it a pleasant or productive time - great for mental health.

Children
  • in reply to Iain

    I totally avoid social media for that reason and don't participate in it in any way, I'm aware of how false it is which I think is very fortunate.

    Unfortunately for me I find it very difficult being alone ALL the time, I read somewhere that there are some people who naturally are able to be alone and aren't affected by it at all, whereas others are very much affected by it, and it can be quite detrimental to mental health. I think its down to life circumstances as to whether your affected by it or not

    Thats interesting re dealing with work stresses...