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Neurotypical trying to support my fiance through autism assessment

Jaybird86

Hi All 

Hoping you can help me. I'm neurotypical and my fiance who is in his 30s has decided to seek an autism referral. The longer we have been together the more I feel he has dropped his masking and I can see he is neurodivergent. He has struggled more since letting me in as finding it harder to mask in the outside world. I have encouraged him to just be himself stuff the people who don't like that but he is feeling overwhelmed with his emotions. He will often let everything build up and hideaway until he reaches a point he has to vent to me about everything. If there is anything I could do to help him before he is overwhelmed let me know.

We completed masses of questionnaires as part of his autism assessment and are currently waiting for the face to face part. The questionnaires revealed a lot more struggles than I was aware of and made him open up about childhood trauma and he has admitted he currently feels depressed. I have encouraged him to chat to his gp about his antidepressant, go back to Andy's man's club as he found them useful in the past and asked if there is anything I can do. I know this referral is only going to feel harder as it goes on. So I'm asking for information on what happens next as part of the assessment to help prepare him, is there any support groups for adults going through assessment and is there any support groups for families of adults as I know we can't do this alone and will need support along the way.

Really appreciate any help anyone can offer as this is all new to me.

Parents

  • yes he will need to speak to GP and separate the depression from the ASD assessment

    I suffer like many autistics with Anxiety but not with depression - so can't advise on that, but do know that needs addressing asap.

    For Autism Support look for local support groups in your area - use the NAS directory https://www.autism.org.uk/autism-services-directory but know that support is varied depending on where you live.  Some support groups cover all ages including late diagnosed.

    I start my NHS support next week - taken around 6 months, following self referral to Talking Therapies - but I'm not sure its really targeted for Autism - so I'm largely be dealing with my anxiety / social anxiety with are more really consequences of my autism.

    I have had private Therapy too - which was paid by my health insurance.

    See what he can get via the NHS and local support groups first would be my advice, unless you have the funds to go private.

Reply

  • yes he will need to speak to GP and separate the depression from the ASD assessment

    I suffer like many autistics with Anxiety but not with depression - so can't advise on that, but do know that needs addressing asap.

    For Autism Support look for local support groups in your area - use the NAS directory https://www.autism.org.uk/autism-services-directory but know that support is varied depending on where you live.  Some support groups cover all ages including late diagnosed.

    I start my NHS support next week - taken around 6 months, following self referral to Talking Therapies - but I'm not sure its really targeted for Autism - so I'm largely be dealing with my anxiety / social anxiety with are more really consequences of my autism.

    I have had private Therapy too - which was paid by my health insurance.

    See what he can get via the NHS and local support groups first would be my advice, unless you have the funds to go private.

Children