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cat34

Hi there

I am a single Mum and wondered if anyone could give me a bit of help and advice.

My son is 6yrs old and his school are pushing for a diagnosis of ASD I am not sure I agree with this and I am not sure I want to put him through the stress all these observations and 'meetings' could cause him. I agree that the behaviour he is desplaying at school is not acceptable and is not so called "normal". They have already involved the Ed Psych but they said once they have recieved the report they will discuss taking it further. When I read through information on ASD I judt do not feel it describes my son at all, yet when I read about ADHD I feel that describes him fully (apart from the hurting animals as he would not do this at all) but when I mentioned it to the school they just cut me down and said no way.

He is not great in the classroom and argues against the teachers and can hit out at those that try to control him but he only displays these behaviours at school or on the very off occasion when he feels threatened by others. He is incredibly intelligant, he was reading at the age of 3 and is very into science and maths and space and the earth. At home yes he can be argumentative but so can every other 6yr old I know. He likes things to be done his way but then he also loves his hugs with anyone and he has friends and can talk to people with no issues at all. He fidgets a lot and finds it very hard to concentrate on anything for long periods of time (apart from reading books of his choice).

I am feeling very confused on what to do. Will it be better to get the diagnosis? What will happen if we do get a diagnosis of ASD, I know it is not the end of the world but what does it actually mean? What will we get from a diagnosis? Will it hinder him in any way in later life?

I have no idea what to do!! Please give me some wisdom on what I should do!

Thanks for your help

Cat

Parents

  • I will look at your points one by one:

    ''He does do pretend play...''. It is possible to have Aspergers and to engage in pretend play, but the quality of the play can be different to that of neurotypical children, and this can be very subtle. I have Aspergers, and certainly engaged in pretend play as a young child - I was actually quite imaginative and inventive. I had a collection of dolls and stuffed toys, and I would make them talk and move them across the floor, etc; I played 'teddy bear tea-party' with my younger brother; shopping, with a toy basket and toy food, and there are many more examples. However, I usually played on my own or with my younger brother, although I also sometimes played with some younger children, and a girl in my class who I was periodically friends with; but I found it very difficult to play well with groups of children. So don't rule out AS just because he appears imaginative.

    You mention empathy: it is a myth that empathy is always completely lacking in AS. I strugged with empathy as a child (I still do), but I was very caring and protective towards my brother when I was very young.

    Sleeping: Sleep problems are common in both AS and ADHD, but are not required for a diagnosis. I slept pretty well when I was a child, and it was only later that I started to struggle with sleep.

    Sensory sensitivities are not essential for diagnosis, although most people with AS will experience them at some point; they can also be very subtle. I had no problems with food or textures as a child, but have always had periodic issues with noise. My noise sensitivities have in fact got worse with time, and they are worse when I am stressed.

    Not all people with AS are disturbed by routine changes, but this is very common. I have always struggled to some extent with this.  Another manifestation of so called rigid behaviour is inflexible and narrow obsessions/interests, but obsessions are not always obvious at 6 years old.

    Therefore, he may have AS, but from what you write, it sounds more like ADHD. He may even be diagnosed with ADHD plus autistic traits. The autistic traits, however, might become more noticeable when he matures.

    It is wise to get him assessed, in my opinion.

Reply

  • I will look at your points one by one:

    ''He does do pretend play...''. It is possible to have Aspergers and to engage in pretend play, but the quality of the play can be different to that of neurotypical children, and this can be very subtle. I have Aspergers, and certainly engaged in pretend play as a young child - I was actually quite imaginative and inventive. I had a collection of dolls and stuffed toys, and I would make them talk and move them across the floor, etc; I played 'teddy bear tea-party' with my younger brother; shopping, with a toy basket and toy food, and there are many more examples. However, I usually played on my own or with my younger brother, although I also sometimes played with some younger children, and a girl in my class who I was periodically friends with; but I found it very difficult to play well with groups of children. So don't rule out AS just because he appears imaginative.

    You mention empathy: it is a myth that empathy is always completely lacking in AS. I strugged with empathy as a child (I still do), but I was very caring and protective towards my brother when I was very young.

    Sleeping: Sleep problems are common in both AS and ADHD, but are not required for a diagnosis. I slept pretty well when I was a child, and it was only later that I started to struggle with sleep.

    Sensory sensitivities are not essential for diagnosis, although most people with AS will experience them at some point; they can also be very subtle. I had no problems with food or textures as a child, but have always had periodic issues with noise. My noise sensitivities have in fact got worse with time, and they are worse when I am stressed.

    Not all people with AS are disturbed by routine changes, but this is very common. I have always struggled to some extent with this.  Another manifestation of so called rigid behaviour is inflexible and narrow obsessions/interests, but obsessions are not always obvious at 6 years old.

    Therefore, he may have AS, but from what you write, it sounds more like ADHD. He may even be diagnosed with ADHD plus autistic traits. The autistic traits, however, might become more noticeable when he matures.

    It is wise to get him assessed, in my opinion.

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