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cat34

Hi there

I am a single Mum and wondered if anyone could give me a bit of help and advice.

My son is 6yrs old and his school are pushing for a diagnosis of ASD I am not sure I agree with this and I am not sure I want to put him through the stress all these observations and 'meetings' could cause him. I agree that the behaviour he is desplaying at school is not acceptable and is not so called "normal". They have already involved the Ed Psych but they said once they have recieved the report they will discuss taking it further. When I read through information on ASD I judt do not feel it describes my son at all, yet when I read about ADHD I feel that describes him fully (apart from the hurting animals as he would not do this at all) but when I mentioned it to the school they just cut me down and said no way.

He is not great in the classroom and argues against the teachers and can hit out at those that try to control him but he only displays these behaviours at school or on the very off occasion when he feels threatened by others. He is incredibly intelligant, he was reading at the age of 3 and is very into science and maths and space and the earth. At home yes he can be argumentative but so can every other 6yr old I know. He likes things to be done his way but then he also loves his hugs with anyone and he has friends and can talk to people with no issues at all. He fidgets a lot and finds it very hard to concentrate on anything for long periods of time (apart from reading books of his choice).

I am feeling very confused on what to do. Will it be better to get the diagnosis? What will happen if we do get a diagnosis of ASD, I know it is not the end of the world but what does it actually mean? What will we get from a diagnosis? Will it hinder him in any way in later life?

I have no idea what to do!! Please give me some wisdom on what I should do!

Thanks for your help

Cat

Parents

  • Your school cannot force you to get your son assessed against your will.  You have legal responsibility for all decisions concerning him (including where he is educated).  Don't agree to anything you are unhappy with - the school are thinking of themselves because he is disrupting lessons.

    ADHD is often co-morbid with ASC so he could have both, ASC does not mean a child will not enjoy hugs (that's a myth).  Hyperlexia (reading before the usual age) is not uncommon in ASC.

    Think of it like this, what is best for your son.  The right diagnosis will give him the right supports and access to the right environment.  Later in life it's up to him who he reveals his diagnosis to or whether he does or not, but it will entitle him to reasonable adjustments in college/university and the workplace if he requires them.

    Remember that in an assessment, you will be asked for a lot of information about him and his history from birth upwards, so that will be the time to give the information that will help them decide whether (and what) to diagnose or not.  As a child's assessment is multi-disciplinary, the EP opinion is only part of it and it wouldn't surprise me if the school tried to influence what s/he puts because it benefits them.  Other professionals will be involved, such as speech and language and if your son does not show features of ASC then this will all come out.

    You are in control however, the school can't diagnose him and cannot push you to get him diagnosed.  However, if your son becomes too disruptive they may make it very difficult for him to remain in their school and may even exclude him.

Reply

  • Your school cannot force you to get your son assessed against your will.  You have legal responsibility for all decisions concerning him (including where he is educated).  Don't agree to anything you are unhappy with - the school are thinking of themselves because he is disrupting lessons.

    ADHD is often co-morbid with ASC so he could have both, ASC does not mean a child will not enjoy hugs (that's a myth).  Hyperlexia (reading before the usual age) is not uncommon in ASC.

    Think of it like this, what is best for your son.  The right diagnosis will give him the right supports and access to the right environment.  Later in life it's up to him who he reveals his diagnosis to or whether he does or not, but it will entitle him to reasonable adjustments in college/university and the workplace if he requires them.

    Remember that in an assessment, you will be asked for a lot of information about him and his history from birth upwards, so that will be the time to give the information that will help them decide whether (and what) to diagnose or not.  As a child's assessment is multi-disciplinary, the EP opinion is only part of it and it wouldn't surprise me if the school tried to influence what s/he puts because it benefits them.  Other professionals will be involved, such as speech and language and if your son does not show features of ASC then this will all come out.

    You are in control however, the school can't diagnose him and cannot push you to get him diagnosed.  However, if your son becomes too disruptive they may make it very difficult for him to remain in their school and may even exclude him.

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