Need help with suspected AS dilemma

Hi, I am new to this forum and would like some advice on what to do about my partners daughter who is 28 and for many years I have suspected that there is something wrong with her. After doing some research after reading an article that struck a chord I think I am led to believing she may be somewhere on the Autistic/Aspergers Spectrum. I have mentioned my concerns to my partner previously but he brushes it off thinking she is just very lazy and quirky.

My concerns are based on these facts, she is a loner, never had friends, never had a relationship, finds it hard to hold down a job, she runs back and forth in the house and stomps about, may break into a run when we are out and about, has a very odd bouncy walk, you may as well talk to a wall as askl her to do anything. She can never ever do any task big or small straight away (it will take weeks of nagging) and is always late for any departure time that is neccessary. She also talks in an odd fashion, not just normal flowing conversation. I also hear her having sort of arguements with herself in her room and she makes lists of everything.

I need to perhaps have some confirmation that this sounds like an AS problem and maybe my partner will listen so she could get some help. I have always been at loggerheads with her thinking she is abysmally lazy and dirty but obviously it is more than that.

Thank you for any imput anyone may have.

Parents
  • I only know that both daughters were bullied throughout school, this has continued as a pattern in college and work for the one I am concerned about. I think my partner is just used to the behaviours, he does not like conflict so will do things himself or let me do them instead of getting these girls to step up and take some responsibility. I have asked her on many occassions if she would like to speak to me about anything and we do have calm chats where I say I need you to do this to help me out but it is of no avail. She would not notice if a bin was overflowing or indeed the laundry basket which she had just filled to the brim. To be honest I am feeling very tired,  weary and fed up of being the housekeeper.I could be using the little time I have to be helping out my own daughter. I love my partner and when we got together I just assumed his daughters would have the natural progression of relationships and their own places. Once again thank you all. It has been good to get things off my chest and have your opinions. 

Reply
  • I only know that both daughters were bullied throughout school, this has continued as a pattern in college and work for the one I am concerned about. I think my partner is just used to the behaviours, he does not like conflict so will do things himself or let me do them instead of getting these girls to step up and take some responsibility. I have asked her on many occassions if she would like to speak to me about anything and we do have calm chats where I say I need you to do this to help me out but it is of no avail. She would not notice if a bin was overflowing or indeed the laundry basket which she had just filled to the brim. To be honest I am feeling very tired,  weary and fed up of being the housekeeper.I could be using the little time I have to be helping out my own daughter. I love my partner and when we got together I just assumed his daughters would have the natural progression of relationships and their own places. Once again thank you all. It has been good to get things off my chest and have your opinions. 

Children
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